


Fallen/Resurrected

by Asperon



Series: Fallen/Resurrected [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Altean Keith (Voltron), Angst, Bisexual Keith (Voltron), Comfort, Druid Keith (Voltron), Galra Keith (Voltron), Human Keith (Voltron), Hurt, Hurt Keith (Voltron), Hurt/Comfort, Keith (Voltron) Angst, Keith (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, Keith (Voltron)-centric, Lance (Voltron) Angst, M/M, Multi, Pining Keith (Voltron), Shiro (Voltron) Angst, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-17
Updated: 2019-02-06
Packaged: 2019-08-25 01:48:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 57
Words: 38,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16651990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Asperon/pseuds/Asperon
Summary: Lance blames himself for this. So does Shiro. And Pidge. And Hunk. They should've known better. Because Keith is gone now.But introspection, understanding and realization don't come by easily when one has to navigate through the loss of a part of Voltron, a teammate, a friend (and possibly even more than that), the ups and downs of an intergalactic war that will determine the fate of the universe and first insights to your own, confusing feelings. This is especially true for Lance. And Keith.But where is Keith? What is he up to this moment?And who the hell is that new Druid who seems to be obsessed with Voltron even more than Zarkon is?NOW WITH COMPLETELY REWORKED FORMATTING!IF YOU SHIED AWAY FROM THIS FIC BEFORE, GIVE IT A TRY NOW!





	1. In the beginning, there was the bickering

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first piece of literature I ever published! It is also the first fanfiction I ever published! And it is the first Voltron fanfiction I ever published! So please: Tolerate mistakes, but point them out. Constructive criticism and your thoughts on the story and my writing are very much appreciated.
> 
> IMPORTANT THINGS TO KNOW TO UNDERSTAND THIS FIC, ESPECIALLY THE BEGINNING:  
> -S3E4 happens in S2  
> -Because of this, it is Shiro who goes to the alternate reality with the other paladins instead of Allura.  
> -While Shiro, Hunk, Lance and Pidge wound up with that scientist and Keith somehow went with General Hira, only he was told the truth about the Hoktril, that mind-control-neckband. The other Paladins were lied to by the scientist and told an abbreviated, pieced-together story of the Hoktrils true functions. Keith didn't know that though, so he never corrected them.  
> -The Paladins took a Hoktril back with them-unintentionally.  
> -The transdimensional alliance between Voltron and the Altean Empire from another reality still failed.  
> -Instead of what is probably a few weeks, months or even years pass in S2.  
> -Keith's mother still left him and his father after Keith's birth, while his father died when Keith was still a child.  
> -Because of this and the constant abuse and mistreatment in the foster system, Keith has rather severe abandonment- and self-esteem-issues.  
> -These issues go so far that he often attacks people who just mention his parents, him being weak or him running away from a problem.  
> THERE ARE SOME OTHER IMPORTANT THINGS, BUT MENTIONING THEM WOULD SPOIL THE FUN!
> 
> UPDATE SCHEDULE: As long as a chapter is ready, once a day. If I'm too busy with school or have not yet finished the next chapter, this may change to once every two days and so on. I'll try to stay on time though! Now have fun with: Fallen/Resurrected!

“So, why do we still have one of these…uh…?“, Hunk asked, fidgeting with the piece of technology in his lap. 

“Hoktrils.“, Pidge helped out, not even looking up from her laptop. 

“Yeah, Hoktrils. Thanks, Pidge.“, Hunk thanked their resident tech genius, then asked again, “Why do we still have it? Or rather, why exactly do we keep it?“. 

“I guess“, Pidge answered calmly, „ we just forgot to give it back. I mean, that scientist gave it to us so we could take a look at it, but after that…“, Pidge trailed off. 

“Yeah,“ Hunk added, “when Sven and the other Slav intervened and all that stuff happened, we…kinda, uh…took it with us? And now, the Altean Empire from another reality lacks a mind-control-thingy…?“. 

“Exactly.“, Pidge finalised their conversation. 

The lounge grew silent, aside from Pidge’s coding. 

Then Lance walked in. He walked past Pidge, plopped down next to Hunk, stretched his legs out, lay his head back and groaned. “I’m boooored.“ He shimmied over to Pidge, poked into her side and whined. “C’mon gremlin, entertain me.“ 

“I’m not your jester, Lance.“, an annoyed Pidge responded. 

“That’s the problem, Pidge Podge!”, Lance sighed. “Nothing happened today! No Galra attacks, no missions and I didn’t even bicker with Keith! His fault probably…” 

“What’s my fault?”, a voice asked. Hunk and Lance turned to see Keith walking in, bayard in one hand, his beloved knife in the other, a frown crumpling his face. 

Lance grinned. Keith couldn’t have unintentionally presented a better opportunity. “Well, my dear resident hothead…”, he started, but he was interrupted by Keith. 

“Please don’t call me that.”, the Red Paladin asked, looking to the side. 

“Oh, why not? It’s true after all. Shooting first and asking questions later, that’s exactly your style, my dear half-Galra.”, Lance sucked in a quick breath, eager to continue, but was once again interrupted by Keith. 

“Please don’t call me that either.” 

Lance sighed exasperatedly. “Come on, mullet, what’s with you? We’re rivals!” 

“Well, maybe I am tired for once in my life, Lance!”, Keith yelled. “If I can’t even sit down without being humbled by you, I’ll just leave!”. Keith turned around and started walking back to where he came from mere seconds ago, but Lance hadn’t revealed his ace up his sleeve yet. 

“So you just want to run away and isolate yourself again? Like you did at the Garrison? And before that? And afterwards too? Come on, dude, fight me like a man, like a true rival would do!”.   
That stopped Keith right in his tracks, back turned towards Hunk and Pidge and especially Lance, who were all looking expectantly at the Red Paladin, waiting and wanting to see how he reacted. 

Keith slowly lowered his head and clenched his fists until his knuckles turned white, back still turned. 

Lance could practically sense the seething anger radiating off Keith. Anger was good, and right now Lance was angry that Keith hadn’t reacted to his previous jabs, seemingly unmoved and unfazed by their ongoing rivalry. He was so bored and riled up out of his mind that he didn’t even notice the light trembling of Keith’s shoulders or how he hunched said body part just a bit.

Keith turned around slowly, wearing an uncomfortable, pinched smile, fists still clenched. “Come again?”, he asked, barely contained fury dripping off his words. 

“I just asked you”, Lance retorted, “whether you just want to run away and forget your problems like you always do? Hmm?” 

Lance smiled himself now too, but even though it reached his eyes, it was a cold, “you-are-done-for”-smile. Keith openly, hatefully glared at Lance and sucked in a harsh breath. 

Then, everything became a blur.

Keith dropped his bayard and his dagger so fast Lance didn’t even hear them hit the ground before Keith was on him. He felt a fist connect with his face, but only after he registered he already was on the ground, Keith straddling him, with one hand fisting the collar of his jacket, the other hand raised as a fist, ready to strike again. 

Keith trembled, his face showing an unprecedented mix of emotions. 

The great Keith Kogane, looking like he wanted to continue punching Lance, looking like he wanted to stop, looking like he wanted to undo what had just happened, looking like he wanted to say something? 

Lance must have had quite an impact on him this time, so he grinned, knowing that despite being the one pinned down right now, he had won.

Lance grinned, and Keith recoiled. Recoiled as in jerked back, jumped up and sprinted out of the room, picking up his bayard and his knife on the run.


	2. Quiznak and Fuck

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There we go! Chapter 2!  
> By the way, I forgot to mention an
> 
> IMPORTANT THING TO KNOW TO UNDERSTAND THIS FIC,ESPECIALLY THE BEGINNING:  
> -Keith is Adam's and Shiro's adopted son (adopted when he got into the garrison), but Shiro really considers Keith his brother

“Fuck, Lance! Are you okay?”, Pidge and Hunk kneeled down next to him, casting looks at both him and each other. 

When Hunk bowed over him, his eyes widened a tad and the Yellow Paladin muttered a quiet “Quiznack” under his breath. 

“I think I am.”, Lance had wanted to say, but he didn’t. 

It was enough to hear himself saying “I think…” to know he was not okay. His voice almost sounded like…Lance raised a hand and prodded at his nose. “Quiznack”, he snorted. 

Really, it couldn’t be described any other way than snorted. Because his fucking nose was broken! Lance got up. “Keith, you bastard…” 

Pidge and Hunk stood around him, unsure what to do, Hunk fiddling with his thumbs, Pidge cursing under her breath, looking just as angry as Lance felt. 

Why the hell did Keith do that? 

“We should go see Coran about this.”, a seething Pidge recommended, dragging Hunk and Lance with her.

Keith ran. To his room. 

Past a surprised Shiro and a Coran that looked like he could have almost gotten a heart attack. 

He was an idiot. A damn idiot. He had hit Lance and ruined everything. 

He knew he didn’t have even the slightest chance with Lance, after all, there was a certain Altean princess on this very ship, but now? 

Now, his chances were in the goddamn negative. 

Fuck, why did he have to punch his crush? 

Keith got to his room and locked himself in; he didn’t want to be seen in this state. 

Fuck, was he crying? 

Keith sniffled and wiped at his eyes-to no avail. He choked out a broken sob and collapsed onto his bed, not caring about still having on his boots or still holding onto his bayard and his dagger like they were the only anchors he had right now or that he was showing all of that dreaded weakness he had hoped to burn away. 

No wonder Lance didn’t reciprocate his feelings. 

The ever-confident, oh-so-capable sharpshooter Lance McClain wanted someone who could walk beside him as an equal, someone who was just as strong, skilled and beautiful as himself. 

Someone such as Allura. 

Keith could only ever hope to wither away in the shadow Lance cast, because no matter how much he trained, fought and steeled himself, he would never match Lance’s grace or beauty in both body and mind. 

Keith curled in on himself and cried himself to sleep.


	3. Help and an impending lesson

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaand...Chapter 3!  
> Also (I'm a bit embarrassed to admit this), I forgot to mention yet another
> 
> IMPORTANT THING TO KNOW TO UNDERSTAND THIS FIC, ESPECIALLY THE BEGINNING:  
> -Keith still has "his beloved knife", but it's not a dagger from the BoM. Of course he took it there too, and they could determine that it was of galran origin, as well as Keith himself (partially at least).

Shiro was surprised when Keith dashed past him, looking like he was on the verge of crying. 

He had never, not even once seen Keith like this. 

Keith, always strong, always independent, crying? 

With a determined gaze, Shiro set to finding the root of this.

Meanwhile, Hunk, Pidge and Lance had made it to the medbay and to Coran, who was greeting them enthusiastically. “Why hello, Number 2, 3 and 5! What can I do for…”, then Coran saw Lance‘s broken nose. “Quiznack!”, he startled. “Who did this to you?”

Lance growled. “It was Keith. Bastard bashed in my nose…” 

“Number 4 did this…”. 

Coran put a hand to his chin, then waved his hand as if trying to scare off an annoying insect. “Let me help you!”, Coran exclaimed and gestured Lance to come over to a medical table. “Lay down, Number 3.”, he ordered, then, as he put his hands on Lance’s nose, added, “This may hurt a bit, but sadly, we don’t have any narcotics right now. Also, this is more of an art than a science…”. 

“Coran!”, Lance shouted, “Just do what you have to, stop making me anxious!” 

Normally, one would have expected Coran to respond, something along the lines of “Here we go!”, but no, one “Crack!” and Lance’s nose looked normal once again. 

The Blue Paladin started screaming and whimpering all at once. 

Coran smiled. “Surprising! You didn’t get unconscious! Amazingly resilient, you lot are!” 

Hunk, with a nervous side glance to Lance, asked, “Do you happen to have painkillers, Coran?” 

The Altean whipped around to him, then looked back to Lance, who had ceased his screaming by now, opting to simply squirm on the medical table. 

“They may be expired or poisonous to you humans or not working at all, but I think that yes, we do have painkillers!” 

Hunk nodded, casting another glance at Lance. “He may need them…”. 

Coran turned around, walked up to the cabinets and started searching. 

Shortly after, he yelled triumphantly, dove out from under a table completely unrelated to the cabinets and held up a white and blue package. 

“There they are! Beta-X-9-plasters! The very best there is…okay…was.”, he said/shouted (?). 

Coran strode back to Lance who now lay completely still, waiting. “Just make sure your nose doesn’t get broken again in some time, number 3!”, he warned while applying the plaster. When he was done, he helped Lance up and pet him on the back. “There you go! As good as new!” 

“Thanks Coran! You’re the best!”, Lance thanked him, stood up and walked out of the medbay, accompanied by Pidge and Hunk.

“Now,”, Hunk stated grimly, “we are gonna look for Keith.” 

“Why?”, Pidge asked, same grim expression pulling at her face. 

“I think he needs a lesson on ‘How to treat your teammates and friends’”, Hunk answered, pulling Lance with him while rolling up his sleeves. 

Lance was impressed. And a bit scared. For Keith. Hunk only ever rolled up his sleeves if he was about to get really serious and when that happened, he was downright terrifying. 

But Lance considered his anger just.


	4. The lesson

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that I didn't upload anything yesterday, but I had to study for a test.  
> To make it up to you, I'll upload two chapters today.

Keith awoke to a loud banging on the door to his room. 

“Keith!”, Hunks voice called from the other side, “I know you’re in there! Come out this instant!” 

Keith tried to stay quiet, but in the end, he couldn’t help but let out another sob. Damn it, wasn’t he in the phase of total numbness already? One really would’ve thought Keith had grown more accustomed to pain and failure over the years, but the opposite appeared true. 

It was silent on the other side of the door, then the banging continued. “Keith!”, Hunk and (her too?) Pidge yelled. “Don’t make us break into your room! Come out!” 

“I’m sorry for hitting Lance!”, Keith choked out. “I’m sorry!” 

It was silent yet again for a moment. “Being sorry won’t cut it, you broke his nose!” 

That took the wind out of Keith. He had…broke Lance’s nose? He hadn’t just hurt him, but maybe permanently disfigured him? 

Keith couldn’t bear the thought. He jumped up and opened his door. “Is he okay?!”, he burst out, trying to get a look at Lance. 

His line of view was blocked by a fuming Hunk and a seething Pidge. The latter poked at his chest. “Worry about your damn self! This is not gonna stay without consequences, you hear me?” 

“Mark our words and grow up, man!”, Hunk added before walked away, waving dismissively at Keith and dragging Lance and Pidge along. 

Lance shot one last look at Keith, a slightly apologetic gaze at that, but Keith was too caught up in his shock to notice.

That was how Shiro found him; at the door to his room, staring ahead blankly, unmoving, unblinking, neither noticing Shiro nor the tears that streamed down his cheeks uncontrollably. 

What had happened to his smaller brother?

“Keith?”, Shiro asked while inching closer. 

Keith startled and whipped his head around, looking like a deer caught in the headlights. Shiro stretched out a hand, unsure of how to help or even just approach his brother. 

Keith retreated backwards, trembling, curling in on himself, breathing becoming more and more shallow and rapid.

And then, Keith’s back hit the wall. 

Next thing Shiro knew, a wailing scream of pure anguish tore form Keith’s throat. The Black Paladin flinched violently. 

He had never heard such a sound before, much less from Keith. It sounded like a banshee’s cry, the only difference being that Keith’s sound marked his own demise.

“Keith?!”, Shiro asked again, stretching out his hand. 

Keith’s stare flickered all over the place, then locked on the Black Paladin’s prosthetic arm. Shiro got the hint and drew his arm back. It wasn’t enough though. Keith took off screaming.

Shiro paled. What in the world had happened to so utterly shake up his ever-stoic brother?


	5. The idea

Lance was being escorted back to the lounge by his fuming best friends. He was still processing what had just happened, so at first, he didn’t notice Hunk saying something. “…he wasn’t even really sorry! I could see it in his eyes, Pidge!” 

Pidge just nodded grimly, but she hadn’t even finished the gesture when she perked up. Like she always did when she had an idea. “We should put the Hoktril to use, Hunk.”, she interrupted Lance’s best friend’s rambling. 

“How?”, the Yellow Paladin asked, still angered beyond belief. 

“I think a scolding isn’t enough to get some understanding into Keith’s thick skull. Let’s put the Hoktril on him for a day or two. I’m sure it’ll do wonders!”, Pidge answered before nearly crashing into a pale, exerted Shiro. 

“Woah, man!”, she exclaimed while jumping back. “You look awful! What happened?” 

Shiro shook his head, trying to catch his breath. “I’m fine. Keith, though…” 

“We know.”, Hunk cut in, frostily. “It’s his own damn fault.”

Shiro gaped at him for a moment, then let out a miniscule sigh before closing his mouth. “What did he do?”, the Black Paladin asked. 

“He and Lance here”, Hunk explained while pulling the Blue Paladin closer to him, “just bickered like they do every other day, but Keith blew up at him and attacked him! Shiro, he broke Lance’s nose!” 

“He what?!”, Shiro managed a sound that was both a sigh and a groan while eyeing the painkiller-plaster on Lance’s nose. “You’re okay, right?”, he asked. 

Lance just nodded, everything still being too much. On one hand, he felt sorry for Keith; maybe they went a bit overboard with the scolding? On the other hand, the Red Paladin broke his damn nose and looked like he hadn’t had enough! 

Lance was being torn apart.

“So what were you just talking about?”, Shiro inquired, falling in step with them. “I think I heard something about the Hoktril?” 

“You heard right.”, Hunk started explaining, having calmed down a bit, “We think the Hoktril could teach Keith a lesson. You know, put it on him for a day or two and make him see that it’s better not to attack your friends. And that he shouldn’t argue and fight all the time.” 

“Yeah,”, Pidge chimed in, “he just needs to see how a bit of obedience and social interaction can change his life!” 

Shiro stroked his imaginary beard at that. “How does that thing work again?” 

Pidge and Hunk feigned shock. “Our leader, Shiro the All-mighty, forgot something! We’re doomed!” 

Everybody chuckled. 

“Come on, guys.”, Shiro nudged them back on track. “That scientist explained it, didn’t he?” 

“He did.”, Hunk confirmed, then Pidge explained, “To sum it up, the Hoktril makes a person more obedient, less aggressive, yet they’re still the same character-wise. It’ll do wonders for Keith!” 

Shiro put a hand to his chin again. “That…actually sounds valid. Let’s hope it helps him. When I met him earlier this day, he looked and screamed”, at that, he muttered “God, I never want to hear that sound again.”, “like you just crushed his entire worldview.” 

“That’s probably what happened…”, Hunk said, then nodded towards Shiro, “Yeah, let’s hope it really helps him. He needs to come off his high horse.” 

They went on but were stopped by Lance. “Wait! Aren’t we gonna ask Keith about this?” 

Hunk turned to his best friend and put a hand on his shoulder. “Lance, if we do that, he’ll just attack us again. Plus, he’ll realize soon enough that we did him a favor!” 

“But…”, Lance wanted to protest, but his argument died on his tongue. “Yeah…”, he admitted sheepishly. “But how are we gonna put the Hoktril on him then?” 

The hall went silent, everybody lost in their thoughts. 

“I know!”, Pidge exclaimed suddenly. Everyone startled but listened intently. “The Hoktril is non-invasive and needs a few hours to boot up, so why don’t we put it on him in his sleep? This way, we don’t have to restrain him…-I mean, he’s still our teammate-and our friend.” 

“Yeah,”, Hunk agreed, noticing the already dimming castle-lights and concluding that the night cycle was nigh, “we just wanna help him. Though, if he pulls off something like this again, I don’t know if I can control myself.” 

“We were just shocked.”, Pidge reassured him. “He deserves a punch for that, and we’re gonna apologize in due time, but first, let’s put the Hoktril on him!”


	6. At night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is really short; I'll upload the next one right away.

The Paladins strode towards the wing of the castle they resided in, grabbed the Hoktril from Pidge’s room and made their way to Keith’s. 

They were surprised to find Keith already sleeping, as he normally hit the training deck every evening, but there he was, curled up into a ball, blanket draped over and around him, one side of the head on his pillow. 

If it weren’t for his hunched shoulders and furrowed brows, one might’ve assumed Keith was peacefully sleeping. 

“Man, look at him, he definitely needs this.”, Hunk said, holding up the Hoktril for a moment before cautiously approaching Keith. 

The Red Paladin’s position was perfect; neck arched out, back turned towards them. 

Hunk carefully slipped the Hoktril onto Keith’s neck, then retreated backwards. 

The Paladins shuffled out of the room quietly, letting the progress bar on the Hoktril do its silent ticking, wishing each other a good night before dispersing into their respective rooms.


	7. The next morning

The rest of Voltron had overestimated Keith’s need for rest.

The Red Paladin awoke to the feeling of having something on the back of his neck. Rolling over and groaning, he found something poking in the back of his skull and neck. Keith sat up, pawing at his neck tiredly. 

He felt something cold. Metal? 

Keith went rigid. 

It couldn’t be. 

They couldn’t have…

He ripped the piece of technology off his neck. Upon looking at it, he could only barely resist retching on the floor. 

The Hoktril. 

Why? Who? 

This wasn’t just not a joke, this was…

With all the thoughts swirling around in his head, came back the crippling self-doubt.   
Had the Paladins and the Alteans finally grown tired of him and just wanted a mindless slave?   
Or was this intended as punishment for yesterday’s events?   
Had Lance taken their one-sided rivalry to new level?   
Had Hunk made true on his promise of consequences?   
Had Pidge decided she wanted to study not only the Hoktril itself, but also its effects on a live sample?   
Did she choose him because he was the weakest? 

“Stop, Keith!”, he willed himself aloud. He punched the wall next to his bed, the pain distracting him from his thoughts. 

Deciding to get dressed, Keith stumbled over to his closet, opening it and gazing upon the poor sight. 

Two shirts, two trousers, two of everything, half of it courtesy of the castle ship’s fabricator. He quickly grabbed shirt, shoes and so on. He shrugged on his favorite, signature cropped jacket afterwards and set off to find his teammates, friends, allies, whatever he could still call them after this development. He took the Hoktril with him too, hands trembling, not being sure whether he should be angry, sad or terrified.


	8. Fight and flight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this chapter is to your liking! Enjoy!

Keith found the Paladins and the Alteans on the bridge, currently discussing the best approach on their next mission. What was it again? Peacekeeping? A raid? Infiltration? 

He couldn’t remember for the life of him, the cold, iron fist that was the vortex of thoughts and feelings in his head clouding his memory and his judgement. 

Keith stumbled into the room, drawing the attention of everyone inside. The busy chatter from before died out, making room for a tangibly tense silence. “H-Hey Keith…”, Lance greeted him with a wave whose meaning Keith couldn’t pinpoint. 

He scowled. If it hadn’t been for Lance’s irritated tone, everything would’ve seemed quite normal. 

But it wasn’t. 

“Who”, Keith spat, throwing the Hoktril to the ground, “thought this was a good idea?” 

Without hesitance, Hunk and Pidge raised an arm. Allura and Coran followed soon after, as did Shiro. 

Shiro, his brother. Why? 

And then, Lance raised his arm, reluctantly, but he raised his arm nonetheless. 

This was all the proof Keith needed. 

Lance hated him, he never had any chance to begin with, he was weak, they didn’t want him, he was dead weight, he- 

“Keith!” 

Keith snapped back into reality, staring at Lance who had stepped forward, towards Keith, arm stretched out. 

Just like Shiro. The pang of guilt that followed almost robbed him of his senses again. 

“Keith!” 

Lance had taken another step forward. “We wanted to help you become a better person!” 

“A better person? By turning me into a mindless slave? No thanks!”

Lance looked like he wanted to say something, maybe argue Keith’s point, but Hunk cut in, roaring like Keith had never heard before. “Cut the crap! Get off your high horse already! You aren’t invincible and untouchable and perfect, Keith! Grow up!” Hunk spat out his name like it was poison. 

Keith took a step backwards, away from the fake promise of safety by Lance’s upturned hand and outstretched arm, away from this new family of his that had rejected him, away from his teammates and friends, his brother and his crush, who all had so brutally betrayed him. 

Lance stepped forward again, hand and arm retracted halfway, hovering in the air unsurely. 

Keith stepped backwards again. He had to escape. He couldn’t fall for this. It was a trick, a trap. They wanted him to fall for it, but he wouldn’t. He wouldn’t put the Hoktril on again, he wouldn’t play straight into their hands. 

“Keith!”, Lance called for third time. “Please, we want to help you!” He looked over his shoulder to the rest of the team, which stood there unmoving, staring at the scene unfolding, or more specifically at Keith, almost like a predator would look at prey. Keith was this prey, but he refused to give up this easily. He wouldn’t let them have their way. 

“Come on guys, help me here!”, Lance shouted. 

Allura stepped forward. Of course she’d be the first one to aid Lance. “Please Keith. This is for your own good.”, she said, concern and seriousness ingrained in her tone. 

So she was this serious when it came to Lance. That explained a lot of things. 

Shiro stepped up. “Please, Keith. You’re my brother, I wouldn’t lie to or harm you. What Lance says is true. The Hoktril will help you.” 

Keith shook his head, tears swimming in his eyes, his whole world crumbling and blurring. Like a fever dream. He chuckled weakly, darkly. “You don’t even know what it does, do you?”, he asked, wearing the same uncomfortable, pinched smile he had worn before breaking Lance’s nose.

“Well, do you?!”, Hunk and Pidge yelled. They shared a side glance before Pidge continued. “I studied it, and I confirmed the very facts that scientist told us! You’ll just be less aggressive and a tad more obedient! It’ll do wonders for you, Keith!” 

Now, if Keith hadn’t been so socially inept, he might’ve argued that point and told them the truth, and this big mess would’ve resolved itself, but Keith was indeed socially inept. Verily so. Thus, he screamed back, “Only if you define “wonder” as “living hell”!”

That was when Hunks last restraint left him. “You’re right, “living hell”, but only if you don’t put the damn Hoktril on! If you refuse to grow up, we’ll have to force you!” 

With three steps, Hunk was beside Lance, punching Keith straight in the face. A sickening, wet crack signalized Keith’s own nose breaking. The Red Paladin crashed into the wall behind him, then sunk to the ground, holding his nose, whimpering, crying, snot and water all the same. 

“Hunk!”, somebody screamed, but at this point, Keith couldn’t tell who it was. It could’ve been Shiro, but his brother had rejected him, or Coran, but the Altean seemed impassive, unfazed by what happened. It could’ve been Lance too, but no, Lance hated him, he probably would’ve laughed or punched Keith himself. So, could it have been Allura? Or Pidge?

Truth to be told, it was everyone, except Hunk of course, but Keith was too shell-shocked to notice anything beyond his own panic and pain at this moment. He was also too out of it to notice the following fight. 

“Why the quiznak did you do that?!”, Allura cursed, startling the Paladins. 

Hunk defended himself. “He deserved it and you know that!” 

“He didn’t, for fuck’s sake! This won’t get us any further!”, Shiro yelled, clenching his prosthetic arm so hard the servos whined and creaked. 

“But he attacked Lance and broke his nose too!”, Pidge protested, her tone giving no indication whose side she was really on. 

Lance jumped up from his crouched position next to a still unresponsive, yet crying and whimpering Keith, and yelled too. “Guys, what the fuck! We’re supposed to be a team!” 

“Well, right now, we aren’t!”, Coran joined them, equally raising his voice. “We need to fix this!” 

“Oh,”, Hunk fired back, “you’re saying that, but wasn’t it Keith who caused this? Wasn’t it Keith who first punched Lance and provoked him constantly? Wasn’t it him who’s constantly rekindling their toxic bickering?”

Over their heated, relentless fighting and yelling, nobody noticed Keith slowly standing up, shivering, hugging himself and wiping at his eyes before trotting off like a soldier of a defeated country coming home would do.

He was at fault. He had caused this, with his weakness, his inadequate feelings and his lack of self-control. He had only caused harm and destruction. Voltron and thus the universe was doomed. And it was his fault. So, if he wasn’t allowed to or incapable of helping, either in saving his team or the universe, he might as well leave and do the opposite.

Or so he thought as he crawled back to his room, packed his clothes, his dagger and left a note for his friends; what a strange word, “friends”, Keith wasn’t even sure anymore what it meant. 

People who cared about you unconditionally and supported you, regardless of who you were or what you did? No, that wasn’t possible. 

Under careful consideration of his recent experiences, Keith firmly decided that “friends” were people destined to betray, hurt and abandon you.

Equipped with his poor number of belongings and thoughts he had grown oh-so accustomed to, he made his way to the pod hangar, taking a small Altean shuttle and setting off to the only place he knew he’d be accepted for who, but more importantly, how he was: the Galra-Empire.


	9. The aftermath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After I didn't get any comments on the last chapter (which made me a bit anxious), would you kindly tell me your thoughts on this and the following chapters? (Only if you want to of course, but criticism and praise is very much appreciated!)

“Hey, where’s Keith?”, was the question that brought everything to a halt. They had long since ceased their yelling, their voices going hoarse after what felt like hours of fighting. Everybody’s heads swiveled around to where they had last seen the Red Paladin, but only the Hoktril was there, lying on the ground as the single testament that Keith had ever been there. 

“Fuck!” Shiro jumped up and ran out of the room, shouting, “Coran, check the camera feeds! Who knows what he’ll do when he’s left alone!” Coran cursed under his breath and rushed over to his terminal, already typing in commands before fully standing. Allura dashed over to her station too, while Pidge sprinted out of the room, with a quick “I’ll go help Shiro look for him!” coming from her. 

Hunk and Lance just stood there unsurely, frozen in their sudden realization. “This is my fault!”, they said at the exact same time. 

The two boys looked at each other. 

“If I hadn’t teased him all the time…” “If I hadn’t punched him…” 

“God, we’re such idiots…”, Lance declared, shaking his head. Hunk could only nod. “If-if he”, Lance teared up, “kills himself…I-I don’t know how I…” 

“Shhh…”, Hunk soothed as he patted him on the back, equally teary-eyed, but still playing the role of the team comforter. He didn’t know how to cope with that potential scenario either, other than going on and trying to be strong. 

He failed, and the two of them cried in each other’s arms. 

Suddenly Coran screamed, startling everyone on the bridge. “Keith, no!” Coran’s gaze was fixed on the display of his terminal, tears glistening in the corners of his eyes. Hunk and Lance paled. 

“Coran, what is it?”, Allura asked, walking over. She looked over her advisor’s shoulder and froze. Slowly, the princess turned to the Blue and Yellow Paladins, seeing them hugging each other even tighter. 

“He didn’t kill himself,”, Allura assured them, head lowered slightly, mouth set in straight line, “but he left the castle.”


	10. A new dawn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I didn't upload anything yesterday! I almost had to pull an all-nighter because of my homework and a miniscule writer's block, but now, here you go! Enjoy!

Life is a curious thing. Even if nothing’s holding you back, you still refuse to let go of it. Keith could’ve just killed himself, but he didn’t. 

Not even as the numbness his shock granted him receded and made way for bubbling hate and all-encompassing sadness. 

Not even as he realized that in all this time, Red hadn’t spoken to him even once, her presence in the back of his mind gone. 

Not only the team, but Voltron itself had abandoned him.

Keith clenched his fists around the controls of his pod. He refused to show even more weakness than he already had. He would join the Empire and become stronger than ever before, so nothing and nobody could hurt him ever again. 

He could already see Zarkon’s command ship in the distance, a looming presence in the vast darkness of space. 

His comm came to life blinking, indicating he was being hailed. Keith opened the frequency, finding a Galra captain staring at him. 

“This is Captain Verak of the Eternal Empire. Identify yourself and state your intentions!” 

So Zarkon’s ship has a name too, Keith thought, while simultaneously finding it very fitting. He smiled lightly and bitterly, attempting a calm, collected approach for once in his life. 

“Greetings, Captain Verak. I am Keith Kogane. I am…was the Red Paladin of Voltron and I wish to strike a deal with your emperor.” 

Verak narrowed his eyes and stayed still and silent for a moment, obviously having awaited anything but a thinly veiled request to come aboard. “I must inquire, Red Paladin-if I can even call you that-what kind of deal?” 

Keith decided that sincerity might be his best bet here. “Voltron has rejected me, and now that I have defected, I found that if I am not allowed to save the universe, I might as well destroy it. Which, at the same time, is the only thing I seem to be good at. I intend to join you.”, Keith answered both Captain Verak’s direct and indirect questions. 

Verak nodded. “An interesting, but welcome way of thinking, young Kogane. Stay on course, our tractor beam will guide you. Emperor Zarkon will be notified of your arrival. Vrepit sa!”, the captain exclaimed, putting a fist to his chest before terminating their connection. 

Keith stared ahead for a moment, contemplating the current way his life proceeded. Well, he concluded, it couldn’t be worse than what he had before. 

He left the controls of his shuttle alone, noticing the bright, purple flashing of the ship’s tractor beam which guided him into the main hangar of the Eternal Empire.


	11. Realization

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A rather long chapter, hope you enjoy!

The Paladins met on the bridge again.

After showing the rest of the team the camera footage and coaxing Shiro out of a complete breakdown, the team sat down. To talk, to think, to understand.

“Why did he leave? We wanted to help him!”, Lance sighed defeatedly, cheeks still wet from the tears he had shed today. 

“Maybe he felt betrayed because we didn’t ask him before putting the Hoktril on him…”, Hunk mused, limp from exhaustion. 

“No,”, Lance responded, “Keith wouldn’t have left over something like that. He’s the strongest person I know!” 

“Yeah,”, Shiro added from the sidelines, “he would’ve gotten over that. There must be something else…” 

The Black Paladin scanned the room, looking for any kind of input. His eyes landed on Pidge, who was sitting on the ground, tablet and laptop beside her, Hoktril laying forgotten on the edges of her reach. “Pidge,”, Shiro asked, “could you check the Hoktril again, please? Somehow, I’m still hung up on Keith saying we didn’t know how it really worked…” 

“Me too.”, Hunk said, back against his seat. “Didn’t you confirm what that scientist told us?” 

With you he probably meant Pidge, who just nodded absentmindedly, already having linked the Hoktril up to her laptop, typing at a speed that shouldn’t be humanly possible. 

Now that everybody had calmed down and realized the consequences of their actions, they were more than determined to get Keith back. They really hadn’t wanted to drive him away, but first they needed to understand what hey had done wrong. 

Everybody retreated to their own thoughts.

So at first nobody noticed Pidge going rigid, back straightening, paling and swallowing after less than a minute of typing. 

Shiro was the first to snap out of his trance, even though he probably had it the hardest. He considered Keith his brother and said sibling had just run away! In space at that too! 

“What is it, Pidge? Is everything okay?”, he inquired, coming closer. 

Pidge turned to look at him, then the rest of the team, who were staring at her intently by now. “Shiro, guys…this is my fault…”, she lowered her head, shoulders trembling. 

“Pidge?!” Hunk got up and strode over to her. He bowed down, laying a hand on her shoulder and throwing a glance at her laptop and the graphs displayed on it. It was intended as a quick glance, but it became an intense gaze as Hunk went rigid himself, freezing in place. 

“My god…”, he said before having to bite back his gagging. “We fucked up big time-and by big I mean galaxy-sized.” 

“What is it?”, Shiro asked impatiently, walking over to them and looking at Pidge’s laptop. “I can’t read that, what does it say?” 

Pidge’s sobbing silenced the room. She choked and coughed a few times before turned her head towards Shiro, tears in her eyes. “Sh-Shiro…he was right…Keith was right! He really would’ve become a mindless slave a-and we couldn’t have taken the Hoktril off afterwards anymore!” 

“What?”, Allura and Coran shouted as they walked over, previously having tried to distract themselves with routine work. 

Pidge waved them over, pointing at some numbers and graphs. “That scientist lied to us and I m-misinterpreted my own numbers based on what I thought I knew! Only Keith, who went with that general, knew the truth…” 

“…and when we tried to put it on him and told him it was for his best, he assumed…”, Lance sucked in a harsh breath, voice cracking even at that, then almost whispered, “…that we didn’t want him anymore?” 

It was posed as a question, but it really was a proposition. The realization hit the Paladins head on, with full force. 

Shiro’s knees hit the ground with a thud. The Black Paladin stabilized himself on hands and knees, but he was still trembling. As was Allura, who had to be supported by an equally shocked Coran. Hunk was still frozen, so was Pidge. 

But Lance, Lance cried. 

It was ugly crying, the type one did when his or her world had just been shattered. The same way Keith had cried, right here on the bridge, when he had still been here. 

“Now I get it. Now I get it!”, he cried. “All this time, our bickering, our teasing wore him down. And then we used the Hoktril…” He didn’t dare finish that sentence, the pain was too great. 

“Wait.”, Lance stilled. “G-Guys, I think K-Keith is in love with me…” 

“Excuse me?!” Everybody had turned towards him, shocked, confused even, but soon, sadness and realization dawned on their faces. 

“It-it would certainly explain his behavior…”, Coran stated, voice drenched in sorrow. Shiro sobbed, still on his knees, but more upright, hands in his lap, tears dropping onto them from above. 

“All this time,”, he breathed, “all this time he just tried to live and l-love, but what did we do? We pushed him away, implying he could and would never be loved…!” 

The team froze. 

“He’s always had his difficulties expressing what he felt, but I never got to the root of it, thinking he was just a typical teenager!” Shiro sobbed again. “Now my brother is out there, unsure what to do, what to think, what to feel! He-He’ll hate us!” Shiro heaved in a shuddering breath. “We have to find him!”


	12. The beginning of the end

The hangar looked normal, like it could’ve been on any other Galra-spaceship, just a few times bigger. Rows upon rows of starfighters and shuttles, sentries and soldiers everywhere, crates, tools and other supplies littering all available space. The landing area and the runway were clear and spotless though, so what kind of pilot would Keith have been if he couldn’t land under such circumstances?

Some soldiers eyed his spacecraft, but they kept it down. After all, right there on the runway was standing who Keith assumed was none other than Captain Verak and a delegation of sentries. 

Keith grabbed his bag and his knife and disembarked the pod. Verak narrowed his eyes. A gesture he seemed to use more often, Keith noted. That could be important, as he couldn’t yet pinpoint the meaning behind it. 

“Welcome, young Kogane, to the Eternal Empire, pride of our navy, command ship of Emperor Zarkon himself.” 

Verak puffed up a bit when he said that. It made Keith smile, but he remembered basic manners enough not to laugh. 

He inclined his head just a little. “Thank you for having me.” 

Verak inclined his head a little too. “So eloquent.”, he commended. 

Keith laughed. “Well, the last time I talked back to someone, my nose got broken.” 

“I figured that much.”, Verak commented, pointedly looking at Keith’s disfigured face. “You might want to visit the medbay about that at a later time.” He turned around, waving Keith towards him, the sentries positioning themselves around the Captain and Keith. “Now let’s go. The Emperor possesses little patience.”

Verak led him through endless, purple-and-black corridors, up stairs and elevators, past labs, messes, dormitories and training halls. 

When they finally arrived in front of the throne room, Keith was exhausted bone-deep. He would’ve never thought he’d have to admit this, but a simple walk had tired him. 

To be fair though, they had likely walked for hours, with nothing to distract one from his own exhaustion. 

Also, it seemed there was no more efficient way to get around. Keith sighed disappointedly. For a 10.000-year-old race, the Galra hadn’t even invented something as simple as teleporters or a railway system? They were already working on teleporters on Earth, and humanity hadn’t even left its home system yet! 

Then he noticed Verak looking at him.

Verak narrowed his eyes. “You might want on work on your stamina at a later time.” Keith left out an audible breath and nodded. 

“I will.” 

“Excellent. Are you ready to meet Emperor Zarkon in person, young Kogane?” 

“I am.”, Keith answered. 

Verak pushed open the heavy doors to the throne room and Keith walked in.


	13. Something

The throne room was impressively spacious, bare and polished to a more than intimidating level. 

Looking around, Keith spotted Zarkon and Haggar on the other end of the room. He started walking and briefly wondered what he was doing here. But he refused to be stopped or even just hindered by simple tricks like the throne room’s aura. 

The further he walked, the more the sinister energy of this place weighed down on him. He felt the need to kneel or bow in front of Zarkon, but said Emperor was still so far away it would’ve looked nothing but comical. Also, Keith wasn’t a part of Zarkon’s forces. Not yet at least.

When he finally arrived in front of the Emperor, his exhaustion was of an entirely different kind. The events of the last hours finally started really getting to him, and he was dead-tired. Regardless, he pushed on. He couldn’t rest now. He was so close to safety and the promise of becoming stronger than ever before, he simply couldn’t falter now.

Keith attempted his calm approach once more and was surprised how easily the words left his lips. “Greetings Emperor Zarkon. I come to strike a deal.”, he said while bowing slightly. 

The Lord of the known Universe leaned forward on his throne and spoke, “I have been informed accordingly.” He narrowed his eyes, a gesture which seemed to run in the Galra blood. “What kind of deal, Red Paladin?”, he asked afterwards, his powerful voice demanding nothing but the truth. 

So Keith started telling exactly that. “Have you heard of Voltron visiting another reality some time ago, Emperor?” 

Zarkon cocked an eyebrow. “I have not, though you vanished from our sights for a short period of time not too long ago. Was that you visiting this parallel dimension?” 

Keith nodded. “In that reality, the Alteans defeated the Galra and enslaved the entire Universe on their own, like you did here. But not through sheer force. Their most important tool is the Hoktril, a non-invasive mind control headband. I don’t know why we took one of these disgusting things back with us, but after a fight, the team tried to put it on me. Only because I woke up earlier from sleep that day than they had probably expected, I could avoid irreversibly becoming a mindless slave. The Hoktril would’ve permanently damaged my brain, had somebody tried to take it off me after it has booted up.” 

Keith paused briefly, being awed at how far his calm demeanor got him. He hadn’t been interrupted, insulted or beaten yet. Additionally, he felt like Zarkon and Haggar were listening intently. 

He continued, “When I confronted the team about it, they all told me it’d be for my best, and when I argued back, they attacked me.” 

Keith didn’t need to explain that point, as it looked like the two Galra in front of him could follow through perfectly, partly to his still broken nose, which pulsed a little while being thought of. 

“I can see that.”, Zarkon stated. Then he wanted to know, “And why is it that you defected and came to us? What about your home planet, Earth, I believe? Or the Blade of Marmora?” 

Keith shook his head. “Neither of them are an option. The Blade works too close together with Voltron and there’s nothing to do for me on Earth. Having learned of all this,”, Keith gestured towards everything around them, “I’d go insane there. Also, I’m not needed on Earth. Or anywhere else really. Except your Empire, maybe. After all, my sole talent seems to be destruction, be it relationships, people or objects. Even my mother left me!” Keith chuckled bitterly at that. “The only thing I have from her is this.” 

He pulled the unsheathed dagger from his belt and held it up. 

There was a shift in the room’s atmosphere suddenly. 

Haggar stepped forward. “Red Paladin! You say your mother gave this to you?” 

Keith was confused and shook his head, but answered nonetheless. “My father gave it to me when I was old enough to handle it. He told me it was the only thing my mom had left-besides memories he’d never tell me of. From what I pieced together, she left right after my birth.” 

Haggar’s eyes widened just a fraction. 

Keith wondered what that meant when Zarkon interrupted them. “Back to the matters at hand!”, he barked. “What is your talent for destruction focused on, Red Paladin?” 

Keith stilled at that. He’d never thought about that. In his childhood, when he had been passed from foster family to foster family, he’d always assumed just him being there made people’s lives worse. 

Now, though, the realization that the only thing going for him was his sword-fighting hurt tremendously. 

He still chose to answer truthfully. 

“Hand-to-hand-combat is my specialty.”, he said, adding, “I’m not sure about anything else, but I learn fast.” 

Zarkon shook his head, and Keith couldn’t help but shudder at the blooming feeling of failure. Even the conquerors of all space didn’t need him. 

The Galran Emperor waved Haggar forward. “Test him! There must be another talent of his, elsewise he won’t be of use to us!” 

Test him? Keith almost took an involuntary step back when the Galran sorceress approached him, but he controlled himself, willing his body not to wince when Haggar put a hand on his forehead. 

He felt a probing at the edges of his consciousness. 

“Let me in. This is going to hurt if you resist.”, Haggar said, but Keith wasn’t sure whether it was with her mouth or in his mind. He relaxed nonetheless, letting the foreign feeling seep deeper and deeper into his mind until suddenly, Haggar was inside him. 

She searched through his memories like one would flip the pages of a book when not being invested in it. 

A crime, if you asked Keith. Reading was his favorite and often only pastime, as for long periods of time, books had been his only companions. 

While he thought that, Haggar went deep inside his mind and his memories, and over the time-Keith couldn’t really tell how long-he began seeing a pattern in Haggar’s search. 

From his earliest years-which Haggar spend considerable time on-to the time at the Garrison and afterwards, she carefully picked out moments like him standing on the edge of the classroom because he was “so smart yet so arrogant”, “so hotheaded” or “his teeth were weird”, him exerting himself physically with unending stamina or him getting random impressions of the past or the future. 

What was she looking for? 

Keith had no time to wonder, as Haggar interrupted his pondering by jerking back and turning towards Zarkon. 

“My lord, I have found something.”


	14. Unexpected

“Something or some things?”, Zarkon asked, and Keith knew in an instant that the Galran Emperor was a lot better at reading people than he was. 

Haggar bowed her head. “Some things, my lord. He possesses incredible talent for Quintessence manipulation. He would make for an excellent Druid, maybe the best we’ve ever encountered.” 

Zarkon’s lips twitched upwards in what reminisced of a smile, cold and calculating. “The best?”, he asked, “Better than even you?” 

Keith almost laughed out loud. If he had been in Haggar’s place, he would’ve responded to that like he always did, but now that he was watching from the sidelines, it was easy to spot that obvious jab. 

Also, he had another talent despite sword-fighting? He could become a Druid? The best Haggar-a Druid herself-had ever seen?

As if she had read his thoughts, Haggar answered, “Yes. He could very well overtake me in power. He is a diamond in the raw, my Emperor. He just needs training.” 

Zarkon chuckled. “I take it you’d like him to become your apprentice?” 

Now Keith was confused. He had already noted Haggar’s special interest in his person, and he was beginning to think said interest ran deeper than just his talent for Quintessence magic. 

Zarkon seemed to think the same, minus the confusion. “My curiosity is piqued, Haggar. What is it that has you so invested in him?”, he inquired. 

At that, the galran sorceress turned to Keith, outstretching her arm. “If you may lend me your dagger for a moment, Red Paladin.”, she pleaded. 

Keith gave it to her, wondering what she could possibly know about or do with it. 

Haggar held the knife up with both hands and began to explain. “This knife…once belonged to me. I gave it to someone 18 deca-phoebes ago, and if what the Red Paladin says is true, the only person to possibly possess this knife and bring it back to me would be my son. Who appears to be standing in front of us right now.” 

She turned to look at Keith.

Wait.

What?

Keith stared straight ahead, having to process what Haggar had just said. He was…her son? She was…his mom?

This explained so many things, yet Keith couldn’t believe it. 

“Mom?”, he asked, turning to stare at his supposed mother. “How? Why?”, he wanted to know, but was interrupted by Haggar. 

“All in due time, Keith.” She swiftly kneeled in front of Zarkon. “Requesting permission to take my son as my apprentice for druid training.” 

Zarkon put a hand to his chin and seemed to think, but even though Keith couldn’t really read the Galran Emperor, he knew he had already decided. “Hmmm…”, Zarkon drew out the already made decision. “Permission granted.” 

And with that, Haggar, his mom, dragged him out of the room.


	15. The end of Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for not uploading yesterday, I had to study for a test that's coming up! Also, I'm in a bit of a low, my writing isn't progressing at the rate I wish it would.  
> But well, here you go!

Keith didn’t really know what to think. Haggar was his mom, he would become a Druid, and be trained by her herself? What would await him in this new life of his? He couldn’t help but feel like another chapter of his life had just ended. After all, he was really joining the Galra-Empire.

Briefly, Keith got an impression from what he found to be the future. He was in a dark room, somebody strapped to a chair in front of him, a group of people bursting through the door behind him. 

He shivered. 

There had been no clearly discernible details, but there never were. 

Thus, Keith was left to wonder and ponder what his future would hold for him. Mostly, he expected nothing, but even with that outlook, he had been led down way too many times.

While he had been thinking, Haggar had dragged him down a number of dimly-lit corridors, past personnel who glared at them with thinly veiled contempt. 

Then, they arrived at their destination, the door swishing open to give way for a room that appeared to be a currently empty dormitory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tomorrow, there'll be a bigger chapter, no worries! :)


	16. Lost&Found

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After yesterday's short chapter, this, the beginning of the main part of this story, will be longer, as will the next few chapters. Enjoy!

The door closed behind them, but Haggar just dragged him further into the room. Only when they arrived at the nearest bunk she stopped. 

Keith’s mother-that word still tasted unfamiliar-sat down and patted the spot next to her. 

Keith obediently followed the unspoken command, not knowing what would come of rebelling and, for once, not wanting to know either. 

After all, who knew what kind of person his mom was…

Judging from what he had seen until now, she was a female version of Zarkon-plus the Quintessence magic. 

His mother’s gaze was downcast towards the ground. Unusual considering her normal confidence-in-a-cruel-way. Now, she had even begun fidgeting with her hands in her lap. 

She was about to say something, and it wasn’t good news. Keith steeled himself for the inevitable rejection. As much as people would feign pity, he knew they never meant it. They weren’t ever sorry, either. 

Which was why what happened next surprised him even more.

His mother hugged him.

She hugged him in a warm, motherly embrace he didn’t even know he had longed for.

Keith almost melted into the embrace, but a question on his mind made him stop. Was this real? Or was it just another test? Would Haggar beat him or lock him away if he didn’t return the hug? Even though he ached to fully immerse himself into the embrace, he kept his limbs to himself, waiting. 

He was surprised yet again.

“I’m sorry, Keith.”, his mom whispered, “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.” 

Now Keith froze, the aching in him drowned out by the realization that before this point, only Shiro had ever truly apologized to him. Because who would ever apologize to the discipline case, the orphan hothead? 

He stilled, waiting for the trap, the reveal, but his mom kept hugging him. Gingerly, hesitantly, he returned the embrace, burying his head into his mother’s shoulder, just like she had moved to do a few moments ago.

The two stayed like that for a long time, before his mother pulled back without breaking the hug. She looked at him, tears in the corners of her eyes. “I’ve done a lot of regrettable things in my long life, but leaving you and your father is by far the worst.” 

She swallowed, then said once again, “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you, Keith.” 

What got to him wasn’t the apology, but the way she said his real name. Not “Red Paladin” like before, or “young Kogane” or “hothead” or “half-Galra” like the Paladins, especially Lance. Keith firmly banished the thoughts of his “friends”. They wouldn’t taint this moment, as fleeting as it may be.

Keith shook his head. “You don’t have to be sorry…mom.”, he said, but Haggar smiled weakly and bitterly. 

“I have to be and I want to be sorry, Keith.”, she responded. “Leaving-missing from your life-what I saw when I read your mind wasn’t even an outline of all you’ve endured, was it?”

 

Keith wasn’t equipped to handle this. Somebody was sorry towards him? Said somebody was his mom? His mom, who had been missing until now? How was he supposed to react to suddenly having a mother? 

He hugged her but insisted on his point. “You don’t have to be sorry. I can handle it.” 

“But, Keith…”, his mother argued, her voice cracking, “you shouldn’t have to be able to handle it…all on your own.” 

At that, Keith realized she had seen his memories of his father’s death. But he couldn’t really think about that now. He was dead tired, and anymore time in this warm embrace might have very well resulted in the best rest he had ever had. 

As if she had read his thoughts, his mom chuckled, tinged with sadness, yet a tad of amusement too. “Let’s do something about your nose first, will we?” 

Keith just nodded tiredly, unwilling to pull his walls up again. He had already let them down, and Haggar was his mom, so, thinking logically, he just stayed still. 

His mother pulled an arm out of their mutual embrace and put it on his nose. Sparks of Quintessence danced along her fingers, and before he knew it, he had become a little numb, but he felt his nose was in the right place and shape again. 

He smiled and closed his eyes. “Thanks, mom.”, he whispered, then drifted off to sleep.


	17. Questions answered

Keith awoke from the questions roaming about in his head. 

Grunting, he sat up, trying to orientate himself. Looking around, he found his mother sitting on the edge of his bed. 

Save for her and him, the room was still empty. Haggar turned around to him and smiled. “Welcome back to world of the waking, Keith. You must have a lot of questions.”

Keith rubbed the sleep from his eyes and yawned. 

“I-yes.”, he simply said. 

It felt like his mom was reading his thoughts again, and he didn’t like it. Mainly because there were things he’d rather forget than share with anyone.

“You’re reading my mind, aren’t you?”, he asked his first question. 

Haggar looked a bit like a deer caught in the headlights. She looked to the ground. “Sorry.”, she mumbled, “I’m just…very in tune with your Quintessence right now.” 

“So you’re not actively doing it?”, Keith wanted to confirm. “Yes. It’s not like I can exactly hear your thoughts, I just feel them.” 

Keith nodded. He didn’t know much about Quintessence, but that sounded plausible. And sure as hell he wasn’t going to miss this opportunity to finally catch up with his past.

“So,”, he started his most important question, “how? How did you get to Earth? How did you meet my dad? Was he even fully human himself? What am I?” 

Haggar smiled. “Not exactly one question, Keith.” 

Keith just repeated his question, “How?”. His mom started explaining, 

“When I was examining a Quintessence phenomenon near Earth, rebels sabotaged my ship. I crashed on your planet, all crew-members dead except for me. Your father was the one to find me in my dying state. He carried me to his shack and nursed me back to health. And somewhere along the way, I fell in love with him. The result of said love…is you. The very first human-altean-galra-hybrid.” 

“Wait,”, Keith interrupted, “so I’m not just Human and Galra, but Altean too? How?” 

“Keith,”, his mom answered in a slightly amused tone, “I’m more Altean than Galra. 10.000 years ago, I’ve been a pureblooded one, but since I lived with the Galra for so long, my Quintessence and DNA have adjusted to my environment. Biology on Earth should know this phenomenon too, I think it is called “Spontaneous Adaption”. Also, you seem to combine only the best of the three species’ traits in you; the Human’s bravery, the Altean’s intelligence, the Galra’s strength.”

Keith squirmed where he sat. He wasn’t used to compliments, not even from Shiro (who had always just given him pep talks), much less if they were from his mom. 

But then he thought back to the throne room, and he had to ask. “What’s your standing with Zarkon, mom?” 

His mother looked a bit surprised, but she answered like she had expected this question. “You mean our Emperor?”, she asked, gently reminding Keith that he was a part of the Galra-Empire now too, “He is actually my husband. So in turn, he is your step-father. Oh, and you have a half-brother!” 

That was… a lot to process. A saddening realization suddenly forced its way onto Keith’s mind. “That means…I’m just a byproduct…the result of an affair?” 

Saying it out loud hurt. 

He always knew and had been reminded through all of his life that he wasn’t anything special, but to have said knowledge confirmed like this…

Suddenly, his mother went rigid, like she had been able to hear exactly what Keith thought this time. She turned to him and firmly gripped his hand. “Keith! Don’t even dare to think like that!” 

That were clear instructions. Keith could work with that, but his mother went on. 

“Your father and I may have not been more than an affair, but I really loved him! As I love you! And you are something special; didn’t you listen to me before?!”

Okay, that…Keith could definitely work with that. The relief and newly-induced strength washed over him like he had never experienced before. 

Then, the door opened, and in strode a group of Druids.


	18. The Quintessence Family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The conversations with Tempus_Usagi in the comments are quite nice, but remember: IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY ABOUT THIS STORY OR TO ME, DON'T HESITATE!

“Hey, mom.”, the druid at the front said, waving lazily at Haggar. 

“Don’t call me that, Macidus.”, Keith’s mom said, annoyance clearly showing in her tone, “We’ve already had that talk.” 

“Aww, come on! Why not?”, the Druid, apparently named Macidus, whined, flopping down on a nearby bunk while the others dispersed throughout the room. 

Haggar rolled her eyes. Keith’s mouth twitched upwards. The gesture fitted her so perfectly, he wondered why she hadn’t used it before. 

“I’m not your mom,”, she said, “and you are not my son.” 

Macidus sighed. “But aren’t we kinda like family?”, he argued. 

Haggar perked up. “Speaking of which, I ‘d like to introduce to my son, Keith.” 

She shifted sideways a bit, enabling Macidus and the other Druids to see him. Keith waved unsurely and attempted a smile. He’d never done well with meeting new people. 

Silence crept through the room. 

Fuck, had he done something wrong? 

“He’s…your son? For real?”, another Druid asked, sounding like he just had to pick his jaw up from the floor. 

“He is indeed, Kosat. But he is not a child of Emperor Zarkon.” 

Keith didn’t know how, but he knew that under their masks, the Druids around all raised an eyebrow. 

“I figured that much.”, the Druid from before-Kosat, it seemed- said, “I mean, he looks nothing like Lotor.” 

Keith chimed in at that. “Is that my brother, mom?” Haggar turned to him while the other druids crooned. 

“Aww, he spoke!”, somebody said. “Can we adopt him already?”, another one asked. 

Keith felt brave enough to level the Druid with an unimpressed stare. His mom had turned to do the same, and the Druids chuckled. 

“Like mother, like son!”, someone exclaimed. Even Haggar laughed a bit at that, but then she gently nudged them back on track with a firm voice. 

“Yes, he is your brother, Keith. Your half-brother, to be precise. I’m sure he’ll come by in a few days and pay us a visit.” 

The room’s atmosphere soured remarkably. Somebody growled. 

Keith looked around, confused. “What? What is it? Is he… not well liked?”, he asked, conforming to the returning formal speech. 

“Not exactly…”, Haggar said, “He…considers the druids to be…monsters because of our…unorthodox duties. He especially dislikes me and refuses to believe that I am his mother.” 

“That’s…how can a son do that to his mom?”, Keith asked, not understanding and angered at the prospect of his brother thinking so lowly of his mom. 

“Not everybody is as grateful as you, Keith.”, Haggar explained, “Besides, your brother has every right to think what he wants. He has never disagreed with the Empire’s ways strongly enough to invoke punishment. Though I wonder what he is doing at this moment.” 

Keith nodded reluctantly. That made sense, but his first impression of his half-brother whom he had yet to meet was ruined already.

Keith hadn’t really noticed it at first, but since the other druids came in, the lights had dimmed considerably. Looking up, he asked, “Does this ship have a night cycle too?” 

Macidus looked up as well. “Figures.”, he said, “We need sleep, you know.” 

“…which you need too, by the way.”, Haggar added, nodding to Keith. She waved him towards her. “Come, I’ll show you to your locker.” 

She strode over to a wall, and Keith noticed it was entirely made up by closets that looked big enough for him to sleep in, both standing up or laying down. Equipped with his poor number of belongings, he trotted after his mom. 

Haggar looked down onto his bag and his knife. Her light smile dropped. “Please don’t tell me that’s all you have.” 

Keith shook his head. “I never had more. Not even as a Paladin, aside from…Quiznack.” 

“What is it?”, Haggar asked. 

“My diary…I forgot it at the castle.”, Keith answered, paling, trembling, “They mustn’t read it. If-If they do, they’ll just have more reason t-to hate me! They’ll know all of my weaknesses! I-they mustn’t read it!” 

Keith sunk to his knees, trying his best to retain his composure, but it was hard, given he had just become worthless to about everybody. The very people who abandoned and hated him probably knew his darkest secrets and hidden weak-points by now. Voltron knew how and where to hit him, and if that didn’t make him worthless to the Empire, Voltron’s arch-enemies, he didn’t know what would.

Suddenly, he found himself engulfed in yet another hug from his mom. While his mind raced trying to determine whether he was being overwhelmed with two hugs a day, other druids joined in, converting this one-on-one-embrace into a group hug. Keith tensed at first, but the warmth and coziness made him melt right into his mother’s arms, who started gently whispering to him. 

“You are more than the sum of your faults, Keith. You are better than that, stronger than that, aren’t you?” 

Keith fought to stay awake, but his mom continued. 

“Even in the small excerpt I’ve seen of your life, I saw you brave situations which some of us here-including me-wouldn’t have handled as well as you. You’re strong, Keith. And even if you don’t feel that way, we’ll work on that tomorrow, okay?” 

With that, Haggar picked him up with uncanny strength, moved him out of the crowd of druids-it seemed like every single inhabitant of this dormitory had come to surround the two of them-and let him undress in front of his locker, save for pants and shirt. 

Then, his mom carried him over to a bunk, lay him down and shed herself of the upper two layers of clothing before occupying the bed next to his. With a snap of her finger, Haggar dimmed the lights enough for it to be almost pitch-black, aside from everyone’s glowing eyes. 

Keith heard shuffling and murmuring around him. A lot of creaking followed and a wave of “Good night, mom.” ‘s rolled through the room. A single sigh came from next to Keith. “We’ll have a talk about that tomorrow. For now, good night everyone. Especially you, Keith.”

Keith swallowed hard. Tears pricked in the corners of his eyes. He didn’t even know he had longed to be wished a good night like this, yet here he was, not remembering a single instance of actually being wished a good night ever before. 

Voice breaking, he responded, “You too, mom.”


	19. A noteworthy discovery

The rest of the day went by in a haze after everyone went to work. 

Following Shiro’s exclamation, Hunk, Pidge and Coran set to fiddle with the castle’s tech, assisted by Allura and supervised by Shiro himself. 

Meanwhile, Lance was left to his own devices. Everyone figured that after the shocking realization of Keith being in love with him, he needed a break.

A break was the last thing Lance needed. And really, the realization had been less of a shock and more of a sudden revelation. Now, things made a lot more sense. But Lance still couldn’t wrap his head around the whole situation. Keith was gone.

Lance wandered from the bridge, and before he knew, he stood in front of Keith’s room, the door opening to him approaching. 

He glanced inside. 

Now that Keith was gone, there was no one who’d glare at him upon walking in, nobody snapping at him or startling from his sudden entrance. 

Though he should have relished in that, an inexplicable sadness overcame Lance. 

He entered. 

Maybe there was something in his room that would help him understand the Red Paladin, his “rival” and “friend”. 

Really, Lance wasn’t sure what to call Keith anymore. All terms he could come up with sounded demoting to a sickening level, yet he had no better idea at that point.

The first thing he noticed was the bareness of the room. 

If Lance had run away, he simply couldn’t have taken everything in his room with him. 

But Keith’s…now that there was no cropped jacket hanging on the wall and the bedsheets weren’t rumpled- which was probably still Keith’s doing- a new pang of sadness shot through Lance at that-the room looked like it had never been used at all. 

Lance looked around. There was small piece of paper on the desk. 

A note? 

He didn’t dare hope, yet he went over and grabbed it. 

He turned it over and started reading.


	20. The note, the book

‘If this fighting is what I cause by simply being here, I’ll leave. Simple as that. Sorry. It’s been fun. Love you guys. Especially you, Lance. Never hated you, you know.   
Keith’

The shock was instantaneous, and Lance had to bite back a sob. He failed and collapsed onto Keith’s bed. Staring upwards, he clenched his fist around the note. 

It was unfair, how Keith had summed up his experience of the past day so well it hurt physically. 

Lance choked on another sob; this short note held so much emotion he could barely process it. After all, Lance wasn’t dumb and able to read between the lines. 

Even if what Shiro said was true and Keith hated them, Lance was sure he still missed the team. 

The Keith-shaped hole in his life suddenly grew a lot larger.

It was hard to cope with all this. 

Shiro was right, they needed to find Keith. 

With the note, a bit of new determination and a lot of sadness, Lance set to helping the others on the bridge.

He was almost out the door, but a last glance back made him stop. Something was off. 

Blame it on intuition, but Lance went back into the room. Stopping right in the middle, Lance slowly spun around, trying to find what irked him. Upon spotting the closet, Lance stopped. It didn’t even look like something was wrong, yet he was inevitably drawn there. 

He opened the closet, which was empty…except for a small black book with a blank cover. It was just lying there, like someone had carelessly forgotten it. 

Lance grabbed the book but hesitated when he moved to open it. 

This definitely belonged to Keith and it looked intimate, like a diary or something, was he even allowed to read whatever was inside? 

Anyways, the others needed to see the note and the book too, so Lance took the two testaments of Keith’s pain to the bridge.


	21. If it's broken, fix it

Coming back to the bridge, Lance found the team crowded around a console Pidge was sitting in front of. 

“Guys?”, he asked, fearing the worst. 

Whatever they had found out, it didn’t look to good; they were all frozen rigid. Robotically, they all turned, staring almost blankly at him. 

“What is it?”, Shiro asked, seeming composed. His shaking and trembling told a different story, so did the tears in the corners of his red-rimmed eyes. 

Taking this in, Lance paused for a moment. “I’ve found something in Keith’s room.” He held up the note and the book and went over to the team, sparing just a glance at the terminal. What he saw though made him freeze as well. 

Pidge answered his unasked question without tearing her gaze from the screen. 

“We managed to triangulate the position of Keith’s pod with the help of an ancient Altean exploration beacon. He…now he’s either Zarkon’s captive…”, she sucked in a hissing breath, “…or his ally.” 

Lance tore away from his friends and stumbled back, pointing an accusing finger. “How…how dare you say that! He…Keith would never join the Galra!” 

Shiro and Hunk stepped away from the group too, but not out of shock. 

Hunk wrung his hands, but Shiro beat him to saying something. “Unless he really hates us now…”, the strain in his quivering voice sounded like Shiro needed every last ounce of willpower not to break. 

Lance wanted to argue that, but he found he couldn’t. Everything he thought up died on his tongue, from “He’d never submit to them!” to “He’d never choose to destroy the universe if he can help it!”. 

That last thought made him wince. What if Keith felt like he couldn’t help it? What if he truly hated them? 

Now Lance was shaking himself. He sunk to the ground, laying down the note and the book he found next to him. 

The others looked down to him. “So…what did you find?”, Coran asked, looking distressed and disheveled like everyone else, even dropping the usual “Number 3!”. 

Lance didn’t even look up. “A note from Keith and a book that looks like his diary or something…I’m not sure whether we should read it…now…” 

“Bullshit!”, Shiro yelled, striding over, “If it brings Keith back or makes him hate us less, I’ll do and give everything I have to!” He picked up the note and started reading.

Just like Lance’s, Shiro’s reaction was immediate. The Black Paladin doubled over so fast he might have gotten whiplash from it. 

“Shiro?!”, the others asked, hurrying over to their now crouched leader. 

Someone ripped the note from Shiro’s hands and read it out loud. The team gasped and sobbed. 

Lance just sat there, smiling knowingly, bitterly, brokenly. Now that he thought about it, there wasn’t just resignation speaking out of the letter, but hidden under that was fear as well. Keith was genuinely afraid of the Paladins.

And that was too much. 

Silently, Lance started crying. Shaking, he picked up himself and the book and made way to his room, leaving behind the note with a broken Team Voltron. 

He’d read that book, whatever it was, whatever it held.


	22. Broken indeed

The trek back to his room was agonizing. 

Every so often, he’d stumble because of his trembling or run into a wall because his tears blurred his sight. Everything just made him sob more.

He shouldn’t be that shaken up. 

It was just a note he had read and objectively, it didn’t contain anything particularly shaking, yet Lance couldn’t help but quake and feel his stomach churn whenever he thought of it. 

Upon reaching his room, Lance was more than ready to just end this day and continue with the next, but something kept him up, kept him going. He needed to read the book, needed to understand what had driven Keith away to such extent. 

Though the book could contain everything, he had to admit. 

He didn’t know how to cope if the book was just…well, a book. 

Lance sat down on his bed, book in both hands. He steeled himself, took a deep breath and opened the book.

Firstly, he noticed the age of the book. The paper was already showing a strong yellow and brown tint and felt brittle between his fingers. Then, the dried blood that covered the first page in large blotches, distributed in a sickening pattern only Keith could explain. 

Lance’s stomach acted up once again. 

What had Keith been through? A quick look at the small, hastily-written headline and date revealed it was indeed a diary, like Lance had expected (feared?). He started reading.

‘So, a diary. I don’t even know why Dad gave it to me. It’s from mom? So I can write down everything that has happened while she was away? She’s gonna come back? Yeah, sure.  
Like I even have a mom. I know I don’t. Also, I can hear dad crying at night when he thinks I’m asleep. I don’t know exactly about what though, but it must be because I’m such a burden. Aren’t I?

Something broke inside Lance. This wasn’t what a-he glanced at the date again-what a fucking 8-year-old was supposed to think! 

He flipped to the next page. The upper right corner was missing, looking like it had been burned away. There was yet another big splotch of blood on the page.

‘Dad’s dead. Just like that. There’s not even a corpse. Burned to a crisp, buried under tons of rubble. I told him not to go back into that building, but of course he wouldn’t listen to me, the reckless idiot. Not really a favorable way to go, but he’s in a better place now, I guess. I mean, I’m not there…?’

Lance just stared at the page incredulously. How…Why?

‘So many empty faces. I don’t even know the people here. We don’t have a corpse to bury. Oh, and mom’s not here, surprisingly. Not.  
It’s not like I need her anyways. I just need Dad. But he’s dead. We’ll see. Can’t get worse, can it?’

Lance read on and on, not skipping a single entry. It was…sickening. Which was all Lance could say, because the sorrow clogged up his brain, but he felt what Keith had endured couldn’t be described with mere words alone. 

Over the course of the 8 years he had been in the foster system, he’d been with more than a hundred foster families all over the country, each and every move, each and every family just scarring him more. Keith had been beaten, locked away and starved, yet he stoically kept book about it, jotting down everything. But that wasn’t all…

‘This all is my fault, isn’t it? If it weren’t for me, these families wouldn’t have to put up with this brat that’s currently writing this diary. Looking back, it’s always been me. I’m always the one to blame. How should it ever be different?’

And then Lance reached the part of the diary which was written about the months in space on the castle, more specifically, the last entry. The one Keith had written the day this mess had started, the day he hit Lance and broke his nose.

‘Fuck. No, that’s not all I wanna say. Lance, should you ever read this (unlikely, I’ll never show you how weak I really am), just know that I am sorry. I’m so sorry. More than you could you ever imagine. I just…God, I’m so dumb for falling in love with you.

But I can’t help it. You’re just so perfect, how could I not? But then again, you have Allura, don’t you? I know I’ll never have any chance with you, so just…get happy with her, will you? For me?  
Actually, forget that last part. I know you hate me. It just shows in everything you do. Sorry.

To Hunk: Sorry for hitting your best friend. Even if it weren’t for your loyalty to your friends, your fighting prowess, your cooking is still awesome. Sorry I never said so. Sorry.  
Pidge: Your tech skills are really needed here. I hope you find your family. Without me being your obstacle. Sorry.

Shiro: Sorry for breaking you and Adam apart. Sorry for ever burdening you. I never wanted this, you know. Sorry.

Coran: Sorry for always being in the way. I just don’t know my way around tech like you and I can’t support people or even advise them like you do. Sorry.

Allura: Likewise, I know my meager skills don’t earn me a stay on the castle. I’m just waiting for you and the Paladins expulsing me. I mean, I’m half-Galra. I’m the enemy, the monster after all. Sorry.

Still love you though, Lance. Sorry.’

Lance wanted to cry, to scream, but he couldn’t. All tears he could offer had already been shed and his voice was hoarse from hours of fighting and sobbing. 

He had all the proof he needed right here. Keith loved him but hated himself. 

Why did that never occur to Lance? 

Because now, as he thought back, it was easy to see how Keith had internally torn himself apart. And if he combined that with Keith’s love for him, that realization almost punched him in the face, as obvious as it was. 

But what was this about Allura? 

Lance slumped on his bed. His back hurt from sitting ramrod straight for hours while reading the testament of Keith’s pain in his lap.

Lance jumped up. The others needed to see this. Right now.


	23. A dream?

Keith startled out of his sleep screaming. 

While sitting up, his nightly terrors unveiled their full potential and he remembered what he had dreamed about. 

He and Lance…had been a couple? That almost made Keith smile, but then the rest of the dream quickly caught up with him. 

Lance cheated on him. 

With Allura. 

And every so often, Keith would walk in on them with their tongues down each other’s throats. 

He began sobbing, raising a hand to muffle himself, but stopped when he remembered the last part of his nightmare. His breath hitched, and he choked. 

When he had caught them cheating the last time, Lance had just smiled at him and said, “We don’t want you here, Keith. Get lost and do whatever an orphan does.” 

Then, the team and Keith’s dad had come up from behind, grabbed him and he just had to watch Lance and Allura…go at it, and he was still restrained, and he couldn’t move and…

A light tap on his arm. 

“Keith?”, somebody asked. His mom? Keith turned towards her.

The eyes.

Keith screamed and fell out of his bed. Everybody in his dream had the exact same, glowing, burning eyes. 

“St-Stay away from me!”, he yelled, pleaded, whimpered.

The lights went on and Keith was blinded temporally. His eyes were swimming with tears and when he opened them, someone was crouched in front of him. 

No. 

They couldn’t have him. 

Keith backed against the wall (bed?) impossibly closer. 

“No!”, he screamed, voice breaking, “No!”.

There was shuffling in front of him, the person disappeared. 

Keith hugged his knees. He raised his gaze. 

His mom and some Druids stared down to him, eyes widened in pity, sorrow, anger? 

Keith sniffled and wiped at his eyes. 

“Sorry…”, he whispered, still trembling, “I’ll sleep outside.” 

He stood up on shaky legs and the crowd of Druids parted automatically for him, but his mother stepped in his way. 

“Why?”, she asked. 

Keith shrunk back out of reflex. “I don’t want to keep you up with my problems.”, he offered. 

“Mom, give him some space!”, someone said. 

Surprisingly, his mother backed off. Keith was free to go again. He almost sighed out of relief, but he knew better than to assume this was over, so he quickly went to grab his blanket. His hand stopped halfway to it. 

He had remembered: “No blanket without permission” -a rule ingrained in his brain from the countless years in the foster system. 

So he waited. 

And seconds passed. 

Minutes passed. 

“Keith?”, his mom asked again. She stepped forward. 

Keith flinched, but she didn’t stop. 

Instead, Keith found himself embraced in yet another hug. He couldn’t help but melt and be terrified of the secret power his mother’s hugs held. 

The other Druids didn’t join in this time, but Keith heard more shuffling and suddenly they were moving. His mom had picked him up in bridal style. Where were they going?


	24. Pain and realization

The corridors were still alight brightly. Keith squeezed his eyes shut. 

Wherever they were going, Keith wasn’t so sure whether he wanted to sleep again. The fleeting images of his nightmare still haunted him, prompting him to whimper softly. 

Sensing this, the other druids and his mom purred to him in a soothing manner. Keith blushed in shame and defeat. Why would they go through the trouble of helping him deal with this? It wasn’t their problem after all…

Over the course of their walk, which was becoming longer and longer, the pain Keith felt only grew until it was almost physical. It was worst around his heart, where it had evolved into a full-blown cramp. 

Keith uselessly clawed at his chest. 

It got worse by the second and flared up whenever he thought of…Lance?

Subconsciously, Keith curled in on himself. His mother almost dropped him from the sudden movement, but Keith didn’t notice. 

Even though his cramps now encompassed his whole body, he couldn’t stop thinking of Lance. Whenever he thought he was beginning to forget his nightmare, he just went back to remember it in its full glory. 

It hurt. 

It fucking hurt. 

Yet Keith couldn’t stop remembering. 

And what scared him most was that he didn’t know why.

But then, the real shock came. 

Keith remembered that it wasn’t just a nightmare, but reality. Lance really hated him. And not just since yesterday. 

Keith’s breath hitched. He began screaming again, convulsing, thrashing around. 

This time, his mother really dropped him. 

“Quiznak!”, everyone around, including her, cursed. Everybody crouched down to Keith, their purring intensified tenfold. His mother gently cupped his head. 

“Quiznak.”, she swore again. Keith’s eyelids fluttered shut and he found himself leaning into the touch. Just more proof he should reconsider the power of touch his mother possessed. He started crying, this was too much. 

What was happening to him?

Over his crying, he missed the whispered conversation between the others. 

“Do you think he…?” 

“There is no room for doubt, Maron.” 

“He’s chosen his mate!” 

“But that shouldn’t hurt this much, right? Should it hurt at all?” 

“It shouldn’t, that means his mate isn’t from within the Empire…” 

“He was a Paladin of Voltron before…what if it’s one of them?” 

“That’d be…most unfortunate…” 

“Not the words I would’ve used...but you’re right.” 

“Come on everyone, this is not the place for an emotional breakdown!”

Keith was being picked up again, and they moved on. It wasn’t much longer until they finally arrived at their destination. The door opened and gave way to another sleeping room.

But this one was different. There were no single beds, just something in the middle of the room that looked like a big…shallow swimming pool, just that the insides of it were padded and there were blankets and pillows all over the place. 

What were they doing here? If they wanted to sleep again, Keith would just keep them up with his troubles… 

Haggar and the Druids around her and him turned to look at him. 

“Oh, Keith…”, someone said, “Keeping us up with your troubles is exactly according to plan. This is the Room of Sleepy Unity.” 

Keith’s mom chuckled. “A confusing and overly dramatic name, but we voted on it.” She carried Keith over to the bed (?) and ever so gently let him down into it. Then she joined him, and so did the other Druids, all still in their nightwear. 

A few minutes passed until they had arranged themselves into comfortable positions, giving Keith time to calm down and process what was happening. 

So, apparently…the Druids wanted to…help him? Surely that was not without a price, because what ever was. 

A few Druids around him and his mother halted their shuffling. “Keith…”, his mother said, “I already told you once, don’t think like that.” 

Keith flinched. His cheeks began to burn from shame. “Sorry.”, he mumbled. “I forgot.” 

“And don’t think like that either.”, his mother added in response to Keith’s excuse.

Keith was confused. But at what point in the past had he not been? Then, the real conversation started.


	25. More pain, less realization

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What I wanted to ask for some time now: Is the the fic angsty (enough/at all)?

His mother put a hand on his shoulder. “Keith…you have chosen your mate.” 

“Gentle way to break it to him, mom!”, somebody commented, but Haggar kept her gaze focused on her son. Who didn’t understand a word that was uttered. 

“What’s…a mate?”, he asked, cocking his head to the side. He could’ve sworn a few druids crooned at that, but his mother’s answer drowned out the others. 

“It’s…Of course you wouldn’t know, sorry. So…Galra mate for life, you know? A mate is like a…biologically induced…” She scratched her chin. “Humans have a word for this…Soul…mate, I think. Yes, soulmate.” 

Keith just stared until the words made sense to him. Lance, his soulmate? Wait, were did Lance suddenly come from?

Haggar smiled at him motherly. “You’re involuntarily thinking of one person over and over again, aren’t you?” 

Lance, Keith thought. No. Yes. No! Yes! Keith sighed defeatedly. “Yes, I do.” 

“Is he or she a Paladin of Voltron?”, a Druid asked excitedly. 

“Maron!”, Haggar scolded. “This is not the time for inquisitiveness!” 

“Sorry mom.”, the Druid apologized sheepishly. 

“Is he-or she-though?”, Keith’s mother repeated the question.

Keith sighed again. The Druids were a nosy bunch. “Yes. Yes, he probably is.”, he chose to answer. 

His mother looked at him. Realization dawned on her face. “Is it…”, she started, “the Blue Paladin? Lance, I believe?” 

Keith cringed from the pain that surged through him at that. 

Which answered Haggar’s question to a satisfying degree. She leaned forward and stroked Keith’s back. He shuddered at the unprecedented comfort this gesture provided him with and arched into her touch. 

It really hit Keith the next moment.

Lance was his soulmate. And he couldn’t be with him. 

He gasped as the pain flared up again. He clutched his chest, squeezing his eyes shut. 

The Druids around began purring to him anew and Haggar intensified her stroking. 

“Mom…”, Keith whispered, “What’s happening to me? I just-I-I don’t get this…” 

“Keith…you have met and chosen your mate. The person you desire to be with. And now that you aren’t with that person, your body and your subconscious are hitting you with the repercussions. This is the drawback of the Galra in you.” 

The pain grew and grew. White spots danced in Keith’s vision. “Is there a way to reverse this?” 

Everybody stilled. “Are you sure you want to go down that path?”, Macidus asked from the sidelines. 

Keith buried his face in his mother’s shoulder. “He hates me!”, he said, and pain followed that statement, “From his perspective, we’re not even friends!”, the white spots turned to black spots, “I’m nothing but an obstacle to him!”, he almost fainted, “He…”, Keith swallowed, “He loves someone else!”

Silence.

Keith barely clung to his consciousness, just like he clung to Haggar.

“Keith, it’s impossible for mates to hate each other, regardless of species or gender.”, somebody argued.

Keith’s sorrow turned into anger.

“Then read my mind!”, he screamed, “Read my mind and show me a single instance where he didn’t make fun of me! Where he…”, Keith’s breath caught in his throat, “…loved me.”

The Druids shuffled around. Everybody put a hand on his neighbor’s shoulder and Haggar put a hand on Keith’s forehead, just like she had done a few hours…vargas ago.

This time, the foreign presence in his mind was overwhelming. In a good way. Like it couldn’t be eroded by anything, not even time. And Keith let them in. Let them go through all his memories. 

Halfway through, sleep pulled him under.


	26. Facts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since nobody responded the last time: Is this fic angsty (enough/at all)?

Upon arriving on the bridge, the first thing Lance did was ring the alarm. He didn’t care how brutal of a method of waking up the team that was, the diary was more important. 

At the thought of it, Lance began quaking again. 

He turned towards a console, shaking, trying to get himself under control. It was a fruitless effort. Openly crying now, Lance gripped Keith’s diary tight enough for his knuckles to turn white. 

Behind him, the doors whooshed open and the team stumbled in, almost knocking each other over in the process. 

The alarm went out.

Shiro stepped forward, clad in full Paladin armor, not looking much better than a few hours ago. “Lance? Are you alright? What’s going on?” 

Lance didn’t even care to turn around, he just raised his arm, showing the diary to his team. “I read it. All of it!”, Lance shouted. “The whole damn book! The whole fucking diary!”

Taken aback by his outburst, Shiro tried a diplomatic approach, but he already felt the anxiety clawing at his mind again. 

A few hours of sleep had done wonders for him, yet it wasn’t nearly enough. “Is it Keith’s diary?”, he asked, genuinely interested, but fearing what it could contain. 

“Damn right it is!”, Lance yelled, turning around to them. 

The team gasped at the sight of him. 

He was openly crying, not trying to hide it in the slightest. And even though he was the most expressive part of Team Voltron, they had never seen him like this. Abruptly, Lance raised his arm again and shook the diary. 

“This! This contains everything everyone ever did wrong in Keith’s life! When we get back to Earth, there are a few people we need to have more than just a talk with! But you know, we can actually start with our damn selves!” Lance turned his back to the team once again and brought down his head onto the console. A crack echoed through the bridge. 

“Lance!”, everybody screamed and rushed to his side. There was blood running down his face, but he wasn’t deterred by it in the slightest. His expression was pinched, but it was the screen that had cracked, now flickering with a warning message. 

“Did you know Keith had a crush on me since the Garrison?! On the very first day, when we met for the first time, he fell in love with me! And when he heard of our rivalry I created, he was heart-broken!” Lance took an aggravated breath, tears coming back. “On another note, did you know he mentioned killing himself 3 times in all of the diary? Or that he was convinced he was the problem, the burden, the waste of space through all of his childhood and probably even now?! Or…” 

Shiro slapped a hand over Lance’s mouth. “Please…”, the Black Paladin pleaded, “Stop talking…I don’t think we can take much more…” Shiro took the diary from Lance and shoved it into one of his pockets, saying, “We need to come to understand what was and is going on in Keith’s head…but not now, not like this…” 

Lance nodded dejectedly, and slowly slid down the terminal in front of him, holding onto its edges for dear life. Everyone just stared ahead blankly. This was…They’d better not read the diary, Shiro was right about that. Though the morbid curiosity already began gnawing at a certain Paladin.

Then, a console beeped. They were being hailed.


	27. Moving forward

It was the Blade of Marmora. Their leader, Kolivan, appeared on the screen, usual icy gaze scanning the bridge. 

His stare got hung up on the Paladins. He frowned. “Paladins of Voltron, is there a problem?” 

The Altean princess and her advisor stepped forward, partially blocking the view. 

The Red Paladin seemed to not be present. Which was strange, considering he had struck Kolivan as a person who took their duties seriously. 

But he shrugged it off, focusing on the matters at hand. 

The princess and her advisor looked equally distressed as the Paladins themselves, and now Kolivan’s interest was piqued. Something had happened, and if it concerned all of Voltron, it might compromise his entire plan. “There appears to be a problem. What is it?”

The princess hesitated but opted to answer when her advisor put a hand on her shoulder in silent conversation. “The Red Paladin has…left us. Left Voltron.” 

Kolivan cocked an eyebrow. “Left as in has died?”, he asked, not entirely sure what to make of that statement. He, by all means, was no stranger to casualties, and though the death of a Paladin was tragic, they could be replaced. The Lions were picky, but the universe was big.

The team gasped, and Lance jumped up. He pointed an accusatory finger at the screen. “Do not suggest that! He isn’t dead!” 

The Altean princess made her way past the Blue Paladin, blocking him out to the best of her abilities. Kolivan could see that she was shaken too but tried her best to retain an outburst. “He left the team exactly as the word suggests. We even know where he is.” 

Kolivan frowned yet again. This was getting stranger by the minute. “Then why…and how, if I may ask, has he left Voltron?” 

The Black Paladin shook his head. “He…Keith…We tried to put a mind-control-device on him because we were mistaken about its properties. We genuinely thought it would help him. Then he confronted us about putting the device on him in his sleep and we told him so…It broke him…And now us.” 

Kolivan leaned forward. “And where is the Red Paladin at currently?” 

The whole team averted their gazes. It was the royal advisor who finally spoke. “He is on Zarkon’s command ship. Either as a prisoner…or a soldier.” 

The leader of the Blades nodded. Not quite what the Paladins had expected, but Kolivan went on, raising a hand to quell their resistance. “The Blade present on the ship will take upon that matter. Within the movement-or week like you call it- you shall know anybody on board named Keith or similarly. Should the Blade also attempt to sway Keith into rejoining the resistance should he have allied himself with the Empire? A Paladin of Voltron is worth that risk.” 

At the suggestion of the Red Paladin working for the Empire, the Blue Paladin glared at him again, but he kept it down. 

The Altean princess nodded. “I think I’m speaking for everyone here when I say I want him back on the team as soon as possible. He’s our teammate and our friend.” 

Kolivan saw the hope in the team’s eyes. And he hoped Thace wouldn’t fail. He cleared his throat. “Now then, there’s something I’d like to discuss with you. A plan that might end this war.”


	28. Forward indeed

Keith awoke just a few minutes later when somebody laid him down. He opened his eyes to his mother’s downturned expression and a few Druids who gazed down to him. 

“What is it?”, Keith asked, not exactly remembering what had happened before he had fallen asleep. He sat up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, and the others gave him some space, everybody looking like they wanted to say something. Haggar beat them to it.

“We…didn’t know a person could be this cruel…We’re sorry, Keith.”, she said and everyone around nodded, looking just as sad as before. 

“We’ll help you with this.”, Macidus declared. 

Now it was Haggar’s turn to nod. “And if you still want to, we can find you a new mate.”

Keith stilled. A new mate? 

The surrounding Druids must have sensed his confusion through the psychic bond they seemed to share with him and his mom, because the next moment, a dozen people audibly took a breath, preparing for an explanation. 

Silence encompassed the room for a moment, before Keith’s mother started talking. 

“Of course we should have figured by now the whole process is unknown to you…Have the Paladins or the Blade of Marmora ever even tried to explain to you what was and would be going on with you?” 

Keith shook his head. “They just left me alone with it. I mean, I get it, we were all shocked when it was revealed I was part Galra…” 

Silence.

“That’s no reason to just… leave you in the dark about quiznacking everything!”, someone argued. 

Everybody nodded in accordance and Keith’s mom readied herself for yet another answer. “Normally, mates always choose and find to each other, but that’s granted both parties are fully Galra.”, she explained, “However, if they’re not and the bond is one-sided, the only way to reverse it is to find a new mate. One that is compatible to you on the same level your old mate was. One that-in your case at least- is not a full-blooded Galra either.”

That was… a lot to process…but it explained so much. “How am I gonna find a new mate then?”, Keith asked, determined to get away from the Paladins as soon as possible. “Hell, I’ll even give my limbs if I have to get away from this…”, Keith gestured towards himself, meaning his one-sided bonding, “…this…this curse!” 

The Druids around nodded solemnly and Haggar spoke up again. “Then it is decided. While reading your mind, we learned a great deal about your personality, your skills and your…preferences. Finding a suitable mate should not take more than a movement.”

At last, Keith nodded, sealing his fate. Finally, and for once, he could leave his past behind him, begin anew, make friends, have a family.

Then, the Druids, his new family, wished each other a good night for the second time and went to sleep. 

Keith tried to stay awake, fearing himself slipping back into nightmares, but when his mother embraced him, he noticed she was really warm and smelled good in a soothing, motherly way; his eyes drooped shut.


	29. A plan

It was truly amazing how a normally tiring strategy meeting gave the team new energy and hope. 

Kolivan and the Blade of Marmora had recently thought up a plan to end the war and kill Zarkon once and for all. It had taken a lot of debating, adjusting and many compromises with both Voltron and the Coalition which had been added to the discussion halfway through, but they had found common ground sometime in the morning, common ground on which they had built their plan. It was a risky one, yes, but it was their best bet. 

They’d build a giant teludav the size of Zarkon’s command ship, teleport that ship somewhere unreachable to the Galra fleet and then directly attack Zarkon with Voltron.

The only drawback were the preparations. They’d likely take weeks, if not months, and in that time, everything could change. After all, assembling one third of the universe’s fighting power, collecting the materials needed to build the teludav, constructing said piece of technology, all while defending and liberating more planets and people took the hell out of everyone and everything, especially time. The coalition had to be swift and efficient, they had to work as a unit.

Which brought them a new problem: Keith. Lance couldn’t exactly name the emotion he had felt, but he was definitely less than thrilled when Allura suggested somebody replacing Keith. Upon voicing said concerns, Allura had assured him with “It’s the Red Paladin we’re replacing, not Keith. Our only chance at getting him back is Voltron. This will only be a temporary solution.” 

Lance had to agree to the inherent logic of that. Allura was right, and he hoped desperately they’d get to Keith as soon as possible. He recognized now that the team was not the same without Keith, and in the last days they had seen sufficient proof for that. And somehow, Lance himself couldn’t help but miss Keith. Not just as a rival, but something more he couldn’t quite place his finger on.

But who would and could replace a Red Paladin, the one who gained his strength from his infallible instincts? The warrior of the team? The strongest of them?

Just days ago, Lance would have argued that last statement, but after reading Keith’s diary, he had to admit it was true. Keith had endured so much, yet he had never shown any of it, always brave, always strong.

Luckily, news hadn’t spread yet that the Red Paladin had left the team, but that just added to the pressure they were now under. They had to find a replacement before somebody found out, before something happened.

Considering their more than busy schedule, they first tried seating themselves in Red, looking who she would, if at all, form a connection with. And it worked…a little too good if you were to ask Lance.


	30. (Not) Making a choice (yet)

Hunk strode out of the Red Lion, shaking his head. “It’s not me.”, he said, “I’m not the one for Red.” He shrugged. “Well, I don’t operate on instincts anyway. I operate on my stomach.” 

Lance should have been weighed down by Keith’s absence, but he couldn’t help but smirk just a little at Hunk’s comment. 

The Yellow Paladin, whether intentionally or unintentionally, was the greatest at cheering people up. 

Then it was Lance’s turn. He climbed into Red with confidence but brimmed with fearful anticipation as well. He was sure he couldn’t replace Keith…no, the Red Paladin. They weren’t replacing Keith, just the Red Paladin. Just the Red Paladin. Not Keith. Keith was still out there, waiting for them-Lance still refused to humor the thought of Keith having joined the Galra-Empire.

Lance sat down in the pilot’s seat and audibly breathed out. He took the controls into his hands. “Let’s do this!”, he cheered, trying to distract himself from his own doubts. 

The Lion lit up.

Lance stilled. “Oh quiznack.”, he swore lightly. This was not what he had expected. “But okay! We can do this!”, he cheered again. 

Red rumbled to him affirmingly and projected an image into his mind. It was the Bonding Moment, brought to him accompanied by a sense of urgency, like Red was pushing him to…look for Keith? Find him and do what? 

Lance shook his head. He’d concentrate on what he could understand. He patted instruments in front of him. “I know, girl. We’ll look for him, and I promise I’ll bring him back.” 

Red rumbled again, apparently appeased for the moment. However, Lance could still feel her fire burning beneath the surface of their shared consciousness. 

He chuckled and disembarked the Lion to find the team smiling at him. He smiled back. 

Finally, Voltron was complete-

Not. 

“Who will pilot Blue now?”, Lance asked. 

Everybody’s smiles waned. The team looked around unsurely until Allura stepped forward, regal as ever, if a bit unsure herself. “If it does not cause too much trouble, I’d like to try and see whether the Blue Lion would accept me as its new Paladin.” 

Lance smiled at Allura flirtatiously. “Girl, I would accept you anytime.” 

Everybody groaned and rolled their eyes, but suddenly, Red roared angrily. 

Lance flinched. His smile dropped as fast as it had come, and he turned around. “Whoa! Calm down!”, he tried to soothe Red. She just scoffed and projected an image, then a word into his head, then repeated that process. 

Allura. No.

Keith. Yes.

Now Lance wasn’t dumb, but that he did not get. “What?”, he complained to his lion. “Am I not even allowed to flirt?” Red grumbled.

No.

Lance sighed exasperatedly. “Fine!” He pouted and turned away from Red.

“You know, Keith would definitely find you pouting really cute.”, somebody said next to Lance. He winced and looked down next to him. Standing there was Pidge, grinning maniacally. 

“You little gremlin…”, Lance started, but then he realized what Pidge had just said. He blushed a little and his heart beat a bit faster. Wait, were did that come from suddenly? Must’ve been the exhaustion. 

Shiro loudly cleared his throat in the background. “To know that for sure, we need to get Keith back here first. And for that, we need Voltron. So to say, the blue lion which Allura wants to try and form a bond with.” 

The team got the hint and they went over to Blue.


	31. A new dawn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A very long chapter, I worked hard on this!  
> Sorry for uploading a bit late!  
> Also: Please tell me what you think about this story as a whole!

Keith rose a few hours later, awoken by shuffling around him. Considering he was typically cursed with sleep way too light and not feeling rested at all, he felt really…good. He lay there for another moment with his eyes closed, contemplating the way his life currently progressed, and for the first time in his life, he felt ready to take on the day. Enjoying the remnants of warmth around him where the other Druids and his mom had laid for just a moment longer, he thought some more before finally getting up. 

He had friends. He had family. He had belonging. He had a future. He had gotten away from the people that made his life hell-upon thinking of Lance, Keith’s heart constricted painfully yet again. Keith grimaced, but then he remembered this would go over too. He would find a new mate. One that loved him.

Keeping all this in mind, Keith rose with a smile on his lips. 

Most of the Druids had already left the room, save for a few plus his mom, the latter of which looked at him, some sort of pride embedded into her expression. 

She smiled. “Let’s do this, shall we?”, she asked, motioning him over to his closet. 

Keith swiped his hand over the keypad and it opened without so much as a sound. On the inside Keith found the same things he had seen and added to it yesterday; two simple brown robes, two druid masks, two formfitting bodysuits, two pairs of boots. His knife, his bag and the clothes he had worn yesterday were there too. 

He looked around. The few remaining Druids slowly filed out of the room, leaving him and his mom alone. Since privacy seemed to be rather disregarded in the Empire, Keith just shrugged off his shirt. He went to grab one of the bodysuits but stopped when he heard his mom whisper. 

“Look at you, having grown into such a fine young man. I wish I’d been there to see it.” 

Keith turned around to her. 

Haggar looked a bit like a deer caught in the headlights, then she smiled sheepishly and blushed a little. “Whoops…”, she said, looking a bit embarrassed. 

A new question came to Keith’s mind at that. “Mom?”, he asked, “Why did you leave?” 

His mother’s smile faltered. “The question I’ve been dreading…”, she admitted before answering, “I don’t think it excuses me being away, but I…had to fulfill my duties. 18 years ago, the Blade of Marmora had been particularly strong, there were many of them to root out from within our Empire.” 

“So you had to leave?”, Keith asked, understanding coating his words, ”To do what had to be done?” 

Haggar looked to the side, ashamed. “Basically, yes.”, she admitted, “But it doesn’t excuse…” 

“Mom!”, Keith interrupted, “It had to be done! I get it, really, I get it. Don’t blame yourself for things you couldn’t and cannot change!” 

His mother looked at Keith with wide eyes. “But…” 

“No buts!”, Keith interjected, “We’re together now, aren’t we!” 

Haggar stared at her son for a moment. Before, he had struck her as of the shy kind, the one who didn’t exactly know his way around words. Yet here he was, arguing her doubts like she had done before with him. “Damn, and here I thought I was the one who did the comforting…”, she said smirking. At the same time, she silently vowed to give nothing but her very best in working on their bond as mother and son, they had to catch up 18 whole years after all. 

Keith smiled unsurely. 

Haggar decided to immediately put her new resolution to work and affectionately ruffled Keith’s hair while softly purring to him. Her son all but melted and leaned into the touch, closing his eyes, shuddering. 

Haggar smiled. “We still need to get to work, you know. You’re my apprentice now.” 

Keith opened his eyes, glancing down at himself, blushing when he noticed he was still standing there in nothing but boxer shorts. He cleared his throat awkwardly and slowly, unwillingly extracted himself from his mother’s touch. Inwardly, Haggar chuckled. They’d have to work on her son’s touch-starvedness too…

So she was thinking, watching Keith put on the apparel of a Druid apprentice. When he was finished, he turned to her once more. A motherly smile split her face. “You look dashing.” 

A moment later her smile dropped. “But before we go, there’s some more things to address. Some of which may hurt or be hard adapting to.” 

Keith frowned, but his mother couldn’t see that, as his face was now hidden by the mask which sat unexpectedly well on his face. “What is it?”, he asked, curious as to what was still to be done before he could begin learning Quintessence magic, which sounded genuinely interesting.

His mother took a deep, audible breath. “Easy things first.”, she declared, focusing her gaze on Keith. “Outside of these quarters”, she began, looking less than content, “I’m not ‘mom’, I’m ‘High Priestess’, ‘Haggar’ or both.” 

“O…kay?”, Keith answered, “I kind of…guessed that already? I mean, you have a reputation to uphold, don’t you?” 

Haggar was amazed. “You’re jumping to conclusions, but they’re the right ones. Yes, we do indeed have to uphold a reputation. The one of being the terrific inquisitors of the Emperor himself.” 

Keith nodded. A 10.000-year-old intergalactic Empire whose reason of state was conquest and constant fighting wouldn’t do well with an inquisition of quirky and ultimately soft people, no matter whether that was what they really were. 

“Next up,”, his mom said, visibly nervous and maybe a bit ashamed, “my name is not Haggar, but Honerva. I adopted the former to honor…my first victim…But nobody really knows this…” 

Keith swallowed, both in the literal and the metaphorical sense. This was…a bit hard to process. It made perfect sense though, even more so as his mom began subconsciously relaying hazy pictures and feelings to him through their bond. Confusion, a wilted form in front of her, somebody crouching down to it, screaming its name, sadness. 

Keith nodded. “Okay. Go on.”  
His mother caught herself at his steady tone. She needed it, Keith recognized. 

Honerva took a deep, long breath, then the sentence broke out of her rushedly, like a dam bursting. “You might need to change your name.” 

Keith stared for a second. “From Keith to…?”, he asked, not entirely opposed to the idea. Keith might’ve been the name he’d been born with, but nothing was binding him to it anymore-except bad memories and dead people. His mom seemed to get that through their bond. 

“Ke’Ith”, she declared following the relief dawning on her face. “It was how I wanted to name you back on Earth, but your father insisted it sounded too alien and suggested the closest earthly name, which was ‘Keith’.” 

Keith chuckled. “And now it’s exactly that name which sounds too alien here in space? Is there a special meaning to Ke’Ith?”, he asked, tasting the name. It sounded good and came off his tongue easily enough. 

“The former yes, the latter yes as well.”, Honerva explained, “It means ‘a force to be reckoned with’.” 

Keith laughed lightly again. “I don’t want to come off as arrogant, but I think that might fit just right.” 

“Sure it does, Ke’Ith.”, his mother said, tasting his new name herself and ruffling his hair yet again under his hood. 

Keith melted. 

He really seemed to like that kind of touch. Honerva filed that knowledge away for later use. There was still a lot to learn for her about how to be a good mother, or a mother at all. 

Keith hummed, sensing what was going on inside her head. “You’re already a better mother than what I ever had.” Honerva smiled sadly at her son. 

“There’s still one thing though, isn’t it?”, he asked with closed eyes, leaning into his mother’s persisting touch. 

“Yes, just one more thing.” Honerva produced a small vial filled with neon-yellow liquid from her robes. She held it up, showing it to Keith. “You see, after having lived around humans and only humans for so long, their Quintessence has warped your own to an unhealthy, draining level. To be able to use your full potential in Quintessence manipulation, you need to take this shot…effectively…cleansing your own Quintessence. And changing your appearance to better fit your still dormant Altean and Galra traits.” 

Keith raised an eyebrow. If that was all it’d take, he’d gladly do it. He snatched the vial from his mother and took a closer look at it. There was a needle protruding from one end. 

So Quintessence needed to be injected into the bloodstream.

Sensing his thoughts, his mother provided him with an affirmative nod. 

Keith raised the vial to his wrist and pierced the skin with the needle.

At first, he felt nothing. 

Then the pain came.


	32. The end of Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I named this chapter following the tradition of "The end of chapter 1"!  
> The real fun starts now!

The team stood in front of the Blue Lion, Allura a few steps in front of them, gaze turned to Blue’s eyes in silent conversation. She hadn’t yet tried boarding her, but the team could see they were already forming some kind of bond. 

This was the prelude of the story of Allura the Blue Paladin, they were sure. Though that sounded a bit epic, it was actually pretty anticlimactic when Blue just lowered herself and Allura climbed into her. 

After a moment of silence, everyone cheered. 

Voltron was complete now once again. 

They’d win the war. They’d get Keith back. Somehow, the latter made Lance cheer even louder. He didn’t care though. They could finally get to fixing their mistakes!

Allura disembarked the Blue Lion, looking not as regal as before, but way more relaxed. She smiled, warm and determined. 

“Now then,”, Shiro said, reciprocating that smile, “there’s work to do! Let’s go!”

 

Meanwhile, somewhere deep in the bowels of the Eternal Empire…

Thace wasn’t sure how to feel about his new assignment. 

“The Red Paladin has deserted Voltron. He is supposed to be aboard the Eternal Empire, either as a captive or a traitor. Confirm his exact whereabouts and bring him back to Voltron if possible.”

Couldn’t they just replace the Red Paladin? Thace mentally shrugged to himself. They had probably done so already, but if this served the Empire’s downfall, he’d gladly do it, no matter the risk. He closed the message, rolled his shoulders and went to work. There was a Paladin to find and an Empire to fell.


	33. Changes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas! Here you go with your early/late/just in time present!

It was almost unbearable. 

Almost. 

Keith could take this much. 

His skin was crawling, everything itched, he felt too large for his own body, his bones ached and his ears tingled, but it was barely bearable. 

Though he really, really wanted to scratch his ears, which was prevented only by the pain surging through him in regular intervals. Keith felt his entire being shifting, twisting, changing and he couldn’t help but shudder. 

What was happening to him?

Then, as fast it had come, the pain disappeared. Completely so. 

Keith’s breath hitched in relief. He remained crouched on the ground a moment longer, waiting, seeing whether the pain came back, but it didn’t. Keith looked up to his mother. 

“Curious. You seem to react to Quintessence much stronger than most.”, she observed, then asked, “How are you feeling?” 

Keith couldn’t exactly tell. But he felt… 

“Different.” 

His mom nodded. “That much should be obvious. Now let’s take a look at you.” She guided him over to his locker and motioned him to take off his hood and his mask. With a push of a button below the closet’s keypad, its door turned into a mirror. 

Keith stared at himself. Subconsciously, he raised a hand and pinched his arm. He flinched but didn’t startle out of a dream. And even if this had been a dream, he couldn’t tell whether it was supposed to be a good or a bad one. But, oh well…

The first thing he noticed were the eyes. Just hours ago, these exact same eyes had haunted him and now, he had them as well. Keith stared intently at the neon-yellow orbs, trying to find any trace of its former properties, but to no avail. No white, no black, no grey, no amethyst. 

Next, the face markings. Keith glanced up to his mother. He shared her markings, long red and sharply pointed. He raised a hand once again and touched them. There was no difference to be felt, but Keith had to admit they looked and fitted him rather nice.

After that, he saw his ears. And he instantly knew why they’d itched. They looked like an Altean’s now. Keith reached up to touch them. He lightly traced his fingers along the edge of his ears, and they twitched ever so slightly. It seemed they were really sensitive, as he had to suppress a moan- an actual moan- when his claws…Wait. His claws?

Keith gazed down onto his now lowered hands. Yes, the fingernails were definitely more pointed and looked really sharp too. As if they were made to tear through flesh. Keith winced a little at the thought. He prodded at his face to see how sharp his claws were and actually pricked his skin. In the mirror, he watched the small stream of blood trickle down his face. Passing his mouth, Keith experimentally licked up some of the blood. 

It was then when he noticed something else.

He had fangs. He lifted a corner of his mouth with a finger. Yes, they were really there. His canines had sharpened into actual fangs. Keith bared his teeth. Just like with his face markings, he had to admit they somehow looked good on him and fitted him too.

A moment of silence passed as Keith finished examining himself, then he gazed up towards his mother. 

She smiled at him. “You must be hungry. Care for a bite?” 

Keith opened his mouth to answer, but his stomach beat him to it, growling. He flushed. “Sorry. I haven’t had anything since before yesterday…” 

“Well then,”, his mom answered, “hold out your hands.” 

Keith did as instructed, wondering what his mother would do now. And with a snap of her fingers, a tray of food goo appeared in Keith’s hands. He almost dropped it in surprise. “Whoa…”, he exclaimed in awe, “You can…just…summon things?” 

Honerva chuckled. “I wouldn’t call it summon, rather ‘create from raw Quintessence’, but basically, yes. We can just summon things.” 

And with that, Keith realized his Druid training had just begun, and, brimming with interest and excitement, asked away.


	34. Basics and thoughts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is this pace acceptable/better/perfect?  
> (For reference: Originally, I wanted Keith to try out teleportation immediately and have him accidentally teleport back to the Castle of Lions, where he encounters and fights the Paladins, all while unlocking even more powers.)  
> Also, I kinda feel like I'm letting you down when I don't post a new chapter; with that being said, sorry for yesterday!

Keith would’ve never fathomed Quintessence magic was this easy, yet here he was, hovering a few meters in the air, cross-legged, meditating. 

His mother gazed up towards him, pride showing on her face once more. “Incredible.”, she complimented, “All this on the very first day. It took me a week to even try lifting off the ground.” 

“Didn’t you tell me this was a basic exercise?”, Keith asked, gazing down to his mom-no, High Priestess Haggar. She nodded. “It is, but your talent exceeds all I’ve ever seen, Ke’Ith. Now, on to the next step; let your thoughts flow. They’ll manifest outside your body as accordingly colored streams of Quintessence.” 

Keith nodded, closed his eyes and just let himself be. Whatever came to his mind he humored, making no difference between positive and negative, manic and depressed. Now that he was calmly thinking for once, not acting or expending himself, he noticed how much he really had to think about.

 

The first thing that came to his mind was the Druid training. On their way to the training room, his-High Priestess Haggar had filled him in on the theory behind being a Druid. Which had been…surprisingly little. 

There were two main factors needed to become a good Druid. Those were creativity and synchronization with Quintessence itself. So long as you could imagine something and then be able to channel the Quintessence necessary for its creation, destruction or whatever through yourself, there were no problems to be expected. 

Of course that second factor was a bit more complex, with mental and physical strength, as well as some kind of inherent sense for Quintessence playing into it, but that was about it. And it appeared Keith had been gifted not just with a vivid imagination, but also a lot of mental and physical strength-he’d been a Paladin, for fuck’s sake-and a rather pronounced sense for Quintessence. 

So, Keith seemed to have potential greater than even Haggar, it just wasn’t clear by how many times greater it truly was.

There was another thing Keith realized while he was thinking about all that. He was becoming a Druid now. He was no longer Keith, ex-Red-Paladin, outcast, orphan, he was Ke’Ith, the Druid with family, with belonging. “Keith” was a thing of the past now. So Ke’Ith it’d be. He smiled beneath his hood, knowing his time had finally come.

Next, Ke’Ith pondered the entire “mate”-situation he found himself in. It was bizarre to say the least. 

On one hand there was Lance, beautiful, cute, dorky-the pain returned. Ke’Ith grunted and clenched a fist. This was not the time to be weak. Not when his salvation, his new mate, was so close. 

Ke’Ith hissed as a new wave surged through him. Desire, craving, repulsion, longing, all of it in one go. Ke’Ith couldn‘t help it. And he hated it. He hated that he was so powerless, that he couldn’t do a thing to ease this pain, to forget. 

Yes, to forget Lance. His body protested with a new flash of white-hot suffering. 

And as if that wasn’t just enough, Ke’Ith suddenly did not forget, but instead remembered everything. The soft smile Lance had worn in the bonding moment-which he denied fervently afterwards-Ke’Ith groaned again-the cute way the Blue Paladin would frown when he was really focused on something, the way he could comfort anyone even without words, the way Lance would push Keith to outdo himself because of this stupid rivalry, the way he looked good even with a bed-head in the morning, the way-

Ke’Ith willed himself to stop. 

This wouldn’t do any good. No matter how good-looking or nice a person Lance was, he didn’t love Ke’Ith. He loved Allura, and there was nothing he could do but wait for his new mate. 

So Ke’Ith silently suffered, choosing to rather look the bitter truth in the eye than seek comfort in a sweet illusion. What isn’t real would never become so, or so Ke’Ith thought as he set to fighting the pain, calming himself and taking the first steps to becoming a real, respectable Druid. He was part of the Galra Empire after all! It was Victory or Death!

Honerva looked up to her son. In more ways than one to be honest. He had endured so much and went on regardless of what had happened, always focusing on what was happening. He was scarred by his past, yet paid no mind to it, gaze ahead at all times. 

And now here he was, braving Druid training that took weeks for most in a matter of hours. She took a closer look at the manifestations of his thoughts. 

From one end to the other, the whole color scheme was represented. If you knew what to look for, interpretation of these thoughts was more than easy. 

Lighter colors represented the more positive emotions and thoughts, darker colors the more negative ones. The more heartfelt an emotion or thought was, the brighter it glowed. 

Right now, one emotion stood out in Ke’Ith’s thought processes. A deep, dark purple that had already set to extinguishing other colors. 

Grim determination. 

Honerva smiled once more. It was good to see her son was serious. Not that she hadn’t already seen sufficient proof for that. 

Ke’Ith felt the High Priestess’ gaze on him. He didn’t mind. He felt as balanced as he had never before. He too noticed his determination was slowly but surely eating away at his doubts, his insecurities, his fears; he hadn’t known meditation could be this powerful. 

His mother chuckled. “Now let’s see how long you can stay up there; I’ll be back in a few hours. Don’t forget to measure your time!” Then she teleported away. 

Ke’Ith sighed. Hoping this training room was anything like it was on the Castle of Lions-Damn it, Ke’Ith hated thinking back, especially back to Lance’s-God, stop-he asked “Computer?” into the empty room. 

For a few seconds, nothing happened, then a panel to his left lit up and a monotonous voice asked back, “Yes?” 

“Measure the time I spend hovering in the air starting now.”, he ordered. 

“As you wish.”, came the prompt reply and a timer appeared on the far wall. 

Not that Ke’Ith could read it. So he waited. And meditated. And levitated. And inevitably got bored. 

Just when he had adjusted his stance, the door whooshed open.


	35. Encounter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again: Is this pace acceptable/better/perfect?

All things considered, Thace was old. Very old. A little more than 10.000 years, to be precise. 

He’d been there when the Galra had achieved eternal life and begun their conquest of the universe in search for endless Quintessence. 

Somewhere along the way, his stance on that quest had changed, ever so slowly, but surely, and his change of mind had culminated in joining the Blade of Marmora. 

From his birth until now, he had witnessed a lot of things. Some were good, some bad. Some made him happy, others sad. He had also seen absurd, comical and ridiculous things. But this…this went beyond anything the three previous terms encompassed.

Raising a hand, he stopped the division of soldiers he’d been ordered to train here behind him. Standing in the doorway, he looked up towards the Druid that was hovering there in mid-air, seemingly undeterred by the lack of ground beneath his feet or the strange splashes of color swirling around him.

Thace stepped into the room. His subordinates followed him, disciplined enough not to openly glare at the Druid. Yet he could understand their visible contempt. The Druids were…strange, to say the least, not to mention their cruel, terrifying and mystical ways.

The Druid’s head swiveled around to Thace and his men by just the tiniest amount. He seemed to think for a moment before saying, “Greetings, Commander…?” 

“Thace.”, Thace supplied. 

“Greetings, Commander Thace.”, the Druid completed his salute, then added, “Don’t be bothered by my presence. Do what you must.” 

Thace nodded appreciatively. “Thank you, sir. Though I’d prefer it if you’d not hover directly above my men.” 

The Druid was lost in thought once more. „Let us see whether something can be done about that.”, he declared a moment later. He went still again, then silently and slowly drifted away from the centre of the room, towards the wall opposite to the timer Thace now noticed. It was ticking upwards, counting…how long that Druid hovered in the air? 

Thace mentally shrugged to himself. In the end it was just a Druid. An apprentice at that too, as he could recognize by the simple robes. Thace took a few steps into the room and waved his men forward. “Form groups of two! We will train close-quarter combat today!” 

The soldiers marched past him, eagerness showing in their steps. A fighting Galra is a happy Galra, Thace thought. He sighed quietly and stole a glance at the Druid who was still standing there, in the air, unmoving. 

Taking a closer look, Thace noticed the Druid’s pale, maybe sickly complexion. He must’ve been a half-breed. 

Thace‘s men seemed to have reached the same conclusion, some growling and grunting a little more than what training would have brought forth. At one point, he even could’ve sworn he heard someone mutter “Dirty half-breeds.” 

And that was the point the Druid spoke up.


	36. Confrontation

Ke’Ith had just stretched out his legs and arms into a standing position when the soldiers came through the door. Ke’Ith gazed at their commander. A typical Galra, save for the white stripes in his head fur. 

He looked old. Maybe a bit wise. In any case, he reminded Ke’Ith of something…A Blade of Marmora? Ke’Ith narrowed his eyes and glanced at the commander’s chest insignia. The Blade wouldn’t have people up that high, would they? 

Ke’Ith mentally shrugged to himself, having memorized the hierarchy of the Empire from a quick rundown his mother had given him earlier, already knowing it by heart due to his seemingly Quintessence-improved memory. Having someone remind him of the Blades was probably just a funny coincidence.

Anyways, Ke’Ith was a Druid and as such had a reputation to keep up. He stayed still, kept silent, glaring. For a moment. He wasn’t sure if and how the Druids greeted someone outside of their family, but just maybe it was like this. 

“Greetings, Commander…?”, Ke’Ith saluted and asked. 

His counterpart, though apparently disgruntled by his presence, answered without fail. “Thace.”, he supplied. 

Ke’Ith almost nodded but remembered just in time that Druids didn’t nod, and it wouldn’t have been noticeable because of his wide robes either. “Greetings, Commander Thace.”, he said instead. 

Then he realized Thace had probably not come to chat. It looked like these men were to be trained right now. So he quickly added, “Don’t be bothered by my presence. Do what you must.” 

He almost missed the Commander’s next words as he was awed by how easily these words he’d normally considered stiff came out of him and how much better his observations seemed to be all of a sudden, but when Thace nodded, he snapped back. 

“Thank you, sir. Though I’d prefer it if you didn’t hover directly above my men.”

Ke’Ith raised an eyebrow. The man directly served High Command and called him ‘Sir’? Talk about the Druids being special…though Ke’Ith got where Thace came from. 

Maybe he could try gliding to the side a bit? “Let us see whether something can be done about that.”, he declared out loud. 

Ke’Ith focused himself. Yes, it was possible, he could move, albeit slowly. So he did, silently hovering to the side. He cast a look at the timer on the opposite wall. He couldn’t read the numbers or letters, if they even were what Ke’Ith thought them to be, for dear life. 

He’d have to ask Honerva-the High Priestess about a dictionary or a training program of sorts at a later time.

He saw how Thace kept quiet a moment longer than necessary, gaze trained on Ke’Ith. What could he be thinking about?

Next, Commander Thace took a few steps into the room, gesturing his men forward. “Form groups of two! We will train close-quarter combat today!”

Ke’Ith watched the soldiers get into position. Like a well-oiled machine and without any waste of time the groups came together, looking like they had performed this exercise thousands of times already. 

Ke’Ith was impressed, especially when the soldiers started fighting. Using their real weapons, their style looked more like a deadly dance than the unorganized, amateurish performances he’d seen in his time as a Paladin. 

He couldn’t help but be amazed. Comparing himself to these men, he felt like nothing more than a recruit who had never held a weapon before. And that was considering he had been supposed to be the Paladin with the sword! So why was it that this fighting style got so…lost on the battlefield?

Ke’Ith could see it just a tick later. The soldiers of the Galra Empire, though motivated, were lacking discipline and restraint in some departments. He could hear it in how they growled more than necessary, how they made little offhand comments, how they-

“Dirty half-breeds.” 

Ke’Ith stopped right in his tracks. Who said that? He narrowed his eyes, slowly scanning the crowd. If he wasn’t wrong…yes, it had been that soldier in the back. He spoke up.

“Soldier.”, he simply said into the room, seeing who’d react. Thace’s head swiveled around immediately, but the man seemed to realize he hadn’t been meant. The offending soldier turned as well, looking a bit surprised. 

Yes, Ke’Ith now realized, it had definitely been him. “Yes, you in the back.” The soldier stepped half a step forward, something akin to fear beginning to twist his features. 

“Me, sir?”, he asked, positively shaking. 

“Yes, you.”, Ke’Ith clarified, “Come forth.” 

The soldier looked around slightly, searching for support, but his training mate just clapped him on the back. The man had no other choice but to come forward. 

The entire hall was quiet; if you’d have dropped a pin, you’d have heard it. The crowd parted for him, the soldier himself looking appalled for being called out by a Druid. 

From what Ke’Ith had learned from the High Priestess, the Druids were considered by some to be the embodiment of the Emperor himself. And to possibly be reprimanded by one such embodiment was a less than thrilling prospect, for everyone in the Empire at that.

The soldier arrived almost directly beneath Ke’Ith; he had to crane his neck upwards so much it hurt just by looking at it. “W-What is it, sir?”, the man asked. 

Ke’Ith gazed down to him, waiting for a moment. He could see the cold sweat glistening on the others forehead. Good. Ke’Ith chuckled. If these men had no discipline, he’d give them some. “There are multiple things I’d like to know and you to know.”, he finally answered, and he could see the relief and the terror fighting a trench war on the mans face, his expression changing by the second.

“Firstly,”, Keith held up one finger, “I am not a half-breed, as you so kindly put it. In fact, I combine no less than three species in me. So, if anything, I am a third-breed.” 

Ke’Ith made a pause, breathing in, then he went on. “Secondly,”, his next finger rose, and with it the apparent anxiety the soldier was under, “I wish to know your name. Your full name.” 

Ke’Ith could see how that made the man just sweat even more. He couldn’t keep quiet, but either if he said his name or didn’t, he appeared sure he was going to be punished. Majorly so. 

Though Ke’Ith was satisfied with making the man suffer some immediate consequences, namely being singled out. 

The soldier gulped. “Rak Vagat, sir.”, he chose to answer, his fur looking like it was becoming more damp by the minute. 

“Thirdly,”, Keith followed up straight away, “the name of the unit you serve in.” The soldier straightened up a tad, some of his momentarily forgotten pride shining through. “High Command Guard 1, sir.”

Ke’Ith folded his hands behind his back. “Rak Vagat of High Command Guard 1. I’ll be sure to remember you.” 

And there it was back, the fear, the sweat. Ke’Ith narrowed his eyes and briefly wondered whether that was the Galra in him. A light smile pulled at one corner of his mouth, though nobody could see that. It was probably better that way either.

“There is one more thing though.”, Ke’Ith added to the dying silence. Some had begun moving again already. Everyone froze. “Concerning half-breeds and such, I’d like to ask you something. All of you.” 

Ke’Ith saw what effect that had. Everybody was frozen and sweating now too. Maybe except for Thace, who looked like he had seen this ordeal in the past one time too often. “I’d also like you to think about it.”, Ke’Ith then said. 

“Now let me ask: The half-, third- and so on -breeds serving in the Empire; have they done enough harm to rightfully invoke your hate? Take me as an example. As a Druid, I am a servant of the Empire and an extension of Emperor Zarkon’s will.” 

A few flinched at the mention of the Emperor’s name. 

Ke’Ith continued. “Have I harmed you? Since you’re standing here in front of me, such is highly unlikely, as you would not survive a violent encounter with me.” Ke’Ith could see realization and understanding blooming on some soldier’s faces. “Since you have gone unharmed by me or any other half-breeds, to use that term for the sake of simplicity, what right do you have to hate my kind? I’d rather you’d direct your hate into constructive ways. If need be, hate our enemies. Hate the rebels fighting us because of their species. Or hate the Blade of Marmora because of their traitorous ways.” 

A few growled at the mention of the Blade. 

“But don’t- I repeat, don’t-drive the Empire apart with misplaced mistrust and hate!” 

Ke’Ith glanced around following that.

It seemed his little speech had the desired effect. And all that impromptu! He gazed at Thace once more. The man looked a bit surprised, but also rather approving of what had just been said. 

Ke’Ith let himself smile a bit brighter. It was good to have convinced everyone. 

Somebody coughed; somebody clapped. But Ke’ith’s attention was caught by the door swishing open. 

A sentry staggered in in its typical fashion, metal feet clanging on the floor. The robot scanned the room, finding Ke’Ith floating beneath the ceiling. “Master Ke’Ith.”, it spoke up. 

Ke’Ith could’ve sworn Thace’s eyes widened just a fraction for just a moment at the mention of his name, but he shrugged it off when the sentry droned on. “Your presence is required in the throne room. Emperor Zarkon wishes to see you.” 

Ke’Ith nodded and sighed inaudibly. He slowly sank to the ground, dropping on it from a few feet height rather unceremoniously. He’d have to work on that. Before leaving though, he wanted to know one last thing. “Computer?”, he asked into the room. 

“Yes?”, came the immediate answer. 

“How much time have I spent in the air?” 

“The time I was ordered to measure amounts to 10 doboshes, the total time amounts to 30 doboshes.” 

Every time the computer said a number, he stopped for a short moment, leaving the sentence butchered in typical AI manner.

Ke’Ith began leaving the room, but the computer had one last piece of information for him. 

“Judging by your biorhythm, you could have spent about 2 quintants, 15 vargas and 38 doboshes more in the air.” Ke’Ith nodded his thanks and left the room to follow the sentry, leaving behind a stunned silent unit of Galra soldiers.

“Almost 3 quintants?!”, somebody asked quietly, “That’s insane!” 

Thace watched his men murmur for a tick longer before he said, “These Druids really are something else.” When was sure he had their full attention, he went on, “Especially this one, it appears. I hope his speech has inspired you. Hate is useful, but only if used against our enemies. Remember that!” 

The entire room saluted him. “Yes, sir!”


	37. Set into motion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember when they build the giant teludav in canon? I thought the materials needed were a little...little for what they were trying to build, so I adjusted them...

Turns out, “Work to do” is a pretty broad term, especially when applied by the Paladins onto their current situation. 

After all, they had to collect scaultrite (enormous amounts) from the belly of Weblums (not just one, no, that would’ve been to easy), free a scientist, namely Slav (yes, Hunk, that Slav) from the Beta-Traz prison and had to gather multiple giant Balmeran crystals (again, just one would’ve been too easy, and they couldn’t take them from the same Balmera; it’d kill them). 

All the while, they needed to cover their tracks by freeing more planets and attacking Galra bases and only sporadically working towards their goal. If the Empire caught on to what they were doing, it was over. And they needed intelligence, information for each and every one of these tasks. Even the Paladins were not equipped for plunging into battle head first at every opportunity. As organized (Not!) as they may’ve been, they were still the rebels, the underdogs. One of their own had just deserted them. 

Which brought them to a new point.

“Aren’t you like…gonna exchange your armor?”, Hunk asked. “I mean, Keith left everything here.” Everyone’s expressions became a little more downturned at the mention of their fallen friend. 

“We can’t do that!”, Lance protested to everybody’s surprise, “If he sees there’s a new Red Paladin, wearing his armor and his bayard, he’ll just think we’ve moved on from him; we can’t do that!” 

“I’m with Lance on this.”, a weakly smiling Shiro interjected, “We need to show him there’s still a place for him on the team, as a Paladin or otherwise. We want him back after all.” 

Hunk nodded. That made more than just sense. 

Allura added, “If that’s the case, I might just have the right thing!” She then presented them with a pink bayard and a pink Paladin armor. 

“Looks good!”, Lance said, wiggling his eyebrows flirtatiously. Or at least, he had wanted to do so. As he was about to speak, Red interrupted him by roaring angrily, reverberating through the entire Castle. 

The others stilled and looked at him incredulously. Pidge grinned and adjusted her glasses. “Lion got your tongue, huh?” 

Lance huffed and turned away, pouting. “Red’s chastising me again.”

Allura. No.

Keith. Yes.

Lance sighed. “Red, I don’t know what that means!”, he complained. 

“What means what?”, Shiro asked, everyone, not just him, tuning in on the conversation. 

Realizing there were other people in the room, Lance momentarily looked like a deer caught in the headlights before catching himself and explaining what little he understood. “I just…! Whenever I…try to flirt with Allura, Red just…gets angry and roars at me and like…you know, she just always says,”, he made quotation marks with his fingers in the air at that, “’Allura. No. Keith. Yes.’ Do you know what that means?” 

The team kept quiet for a moment. 

Hunk seemed lost in thought, slowly shaking his head, a frown creased Pidge’s forehead, Shiro looked as far away as Earth was from them right now (And damn it, Lance still missed Earth, his family, the rain, but somehow, right now, Keith being gone weighed him down even more) and Allura blankly stared ahead, expression morphing by the minute. 

Everybody finally set to shaking their heads. 

“No clue.”, Hunk added. 

Shiro crossed his arms. “Let’s hope we find out soon enough. Now, is there anything we can do?”   
Allura pulled up a datapad from somewhere within her royal robes and took a long look at it. “Yes.”, she said, “Yes, there is. Some planets nearby need our help.” 

“Well then,”, Shiro answered, appearing content with the possibility of being able to do something, anything, while their main plan was set into motion, “let’s do this!”


	38. Thinking and Questioning

The walk to the throne room was rather short and uneventful, yet it gave Ke’Ith more time to think. Which was something he’d done rarely, if ever, before this point, he now realized. 

But that wasn’t the only thing that sprung to his attention. 

Now that he had the time to not have to act on his instincts at every turn, he was way calmer, more rational, more balanced. It felt good. It felt right. Ke’Ith loved it. And for the second time now he was glad to have left Voltron. Though he wondered what they were currently up to…

When Ke’Ith arrived at the throne room and the sentry had pushed the doors open for him, he couldn’t help but gape a little. Before, the room had impressed him in the intimidating sense, all dark surfaces and dim, purple lights, but now, it was invigorating. There was no other way to describe it. Sleek and minimalistic, polished and imposing, it was amazing.

The sentry excused itself and returned to its duties, leaving Ke’Ith to stride into the throne room. 

Which he did, full of renewed vigor. He went up to the Emperor and the High Priestess and kneeled. “Emperor Zarkon, you wished to see me?” 

“Indeed.”, the Lord of the known Universe boomed. “I will now question you about the intricate workings of Voltron. Answer to the best of your abilities. Elsewise,”, Zarkon spared a glance at Haggar, “I might have to instruct Haggar to use all her powers on you. We learned great many things through reading your mind, yet there are some things I wish for you to put into your own words, as there are limits to Haggar’s abilities.” 

Ke’Ith thought before answering. “Your wish is my command, Emperor, but if I may take that liberty, I am curious as to why you have not questioned me yesterday already.” 

It was surprisingly simple to fall into this pattern of speech. In the past, Ke’Ith would have recoiled at the use of such stiff, impersonal words, but now, they felt nothing but right. 

Zarkon nodded. “You have every right to inquire.” 

That was unexpected; Ke’Ith felt flattered. The ruler of more than two thirds of the universe granted him a right? 

Zarkon continued. “Contrary to popular perception, I know when to let my subordinates rest. I am not the monster everybody perceives me to be, it is just better to let them think of me as such; it provides greater motivation for them to execute their duties.” 

At that point, Ke’Ith couldn’t help it. “My Emperor, I may have made observations remotely contrary to that mindset.” 

Zarkon narrowed his eyes and tilted his head to the side ever so slightly, then waved with one hand dismissively. “Grace us with that knowledge after this interview.” 

Ke’Ith bowed his head. “Of course, my Emperor. What do you wish to know?”


	39. Newfound respect, discipline and information

It had likely been vargas, but Ke’Ith showed no signs of tiredness as Zarkon questioned on and on. 

Secretly, the Galran Emperor was impressed by this man, no, boy. 

Compared to him, Ke’Ith had been alive for just a fraction of his lifespan, yet here he was, talented, intelligent, a Druid, a servant of the Empire who knew what he was and what he did. That much couldn’t be said about a part of the Empire that was bigger than Zarkon wished it was. He sighed silently and listened to Ke’Ith coming to an end with his explanations about Voltron.

“...I think that’d be everything there is to know about Voltron, my Emperor.” 

Zarkon nodded and thanked him. 

What was most awe-inspiring about Ke’Ith was that he hadn’t adjusted his kneeling position even once, stoically bearing the obvious discomfort. That rare kind of devotion Zarkon appreciated very much; a man with such a quality couldn’t be left rotting on some third-classed planetary base, no matter how inexperienced. 

“Then, my Emperor, may I continue with my observation contrary to your philosophy of an untouchable ruler inspiring greater discipline in his men?”, Ke’Ith asked, ripping Zarkon out of his train of thought. 

The Galran Emperor waved confirmingly. “Go on, share your experiences.”, he added, being once again awed by this boy. He had no restraint whatsoever to tell others his opinion, completely disregarding any disadvantages this might bring. 

Slowly but surely, Zarkon was becoming convinced Ke’Ith might be more of a Galra than most of his full-blooded colleagues, both in the Druid Order and the regular military. Over his pondering, he almost missed Ke’Ith’s first words.

“Very well, thank you, my Emperor. Today, I encountered what might be considered typical racism in the Empire.” 

Zarkon mentally frowned. What had racism to do with discipline? Well, he trusted Ke’Ith to get to that shortly. 

“While I was performing an exercise the High Priestess had ordered me to do, a unit of soldiers entered the training room I was situated in; it was High Command Guard 1 under the leadership of Commander Thace.” 

Zarkon could see where this was going. He grimaced, having encountered this and similar problems in the past already. One too many times for his taste. 

But if Ke’Ith saw his change of expression at all, it didn’t strike him as a cue to stop. “While these soldiers performed exercises of their own, I started noticing how they growled and made off-hand comments more than what training would require or respectively bring forth. This reached its peak when a soldier directed the comment ‘Dirty half-breeds.’ at me, thinking I couldn’t hear him. When I confronted him and the rest of his unit about this racist mindset and its inappropriateness in our Empire’s service, they initially showed no sign of understanding or betterment, just plain fear for being scolded by a Druid. But when I started really talking to them, told them about how their hate should rather be reserved for their enemies instead of their allies, that changed. They realized a Druid”, Ke’Ith put emphasis on the last part, showing how absurd that situation would’ve normally been, “was talking to them. On eye level. And before I was summoned here, I could see in the faces of everyone”, Ke’Ith put great emphasis to the last word, “that my little speech had definitely achieved the desired effect. My Emperor, we must talk with each other. It may be annoying and time-consuming, but it is the best we can do to inspire our comrades and subordinates to fulfill their duties with more discipline and determination.” 

The throne room went silent as Zarkon pondered what Ke’Ith had just said. It made sense and coincided with his experiences. The old ways would prevail, he was sure, but maybe, just maybe, it was time for a change, as minor or temporary as it may be. “I will take it into consideration.”, he declared. 

Ke’Ith bowed his head. “That is all I can ask for, my Emperor.” 

Zarkon narrowed his eyes. “You may be excused. Go continue your training.” 

“Of course, my Emperor.”, Ke’Ith answered, rising from his kneeling position, turning towards Haggar. “Any new orders, High Priestess?” 

The addressed sorceress nodded, waving Ke’Ith a step forward. “Yes, indeed. Go back to the training room but try to feel the Quintessence around you instead of your own. This is another basic step that must be completed before any further skills can be developed.” 

Ke’Ith straightened his back. “As you wish, High Priestess.” With that, the Druid apprentice left the room.

“He is quite something, is he not?”, Zarkon asked into the room. 

“He is indeed.”, the only other person present answered. 

The Lord of the known Universe turned towards his right hand. “Do you have a clear estimate on his true power by now?” 

Haggar bowed her head. “Apologies, my Emperor, taking tests from afar is time-intensive. For all we know yet, he could singlehandedly charge the Komar.” 

Zarkon put a hand to his chin. “Most impressive. Have you determined a place for him and his wife in the Empire by now, then?”, he asked, steering the conversation in a different direction. 

“His wife, sir?”, the Galran sorceress inquired incredulously. 

Zarkon sighed. “Please do not tell me you forgot to inform him that his mate is most likely to be female and that mating anew is conducted by marriage.” 

Haggar looked a bit like she was caught with a hand in the cookie jar. She bowed her head again. “Apologies, my Emperor, it appears exactly that has happened.” 

For a moment, silence encompassed the two in the suddenly far too big room. 

“In that case,”, Zarkon sighed while pinching the bridge of his nose, “go inform him as soon as possible. I highly doubt he will take kindly to information withdrawal of such gravity.” 

Haggar cleared her throat a little awkwardly. “Indeed. Though I believe he will protest the first part more than the latter, as he doesn’t seem even just remotely aware of his true sexuality.” Then she too left the room, hurriedly. 

Zarkon sighed and leaned his head back before a knock sounded on the far door, somebody came in and the next audience began.


	40. Another skirmish in the reaches of space

“Guys, we’re in!” “Good, now-!“ “Lance, on your left!” “Whoa! Thanks, Hunk!” “Shiro!” “How far are you?” “Allura’s just disposed of the sentries, hacking the data base now!” “How long do you need?” “Dunno, give us two minutes!” “Alri- Hunk! Behind you!”

Captain Taika could only watch in disbelief as the Lions of Voltron shredded his fleet, fighter after fighter, cruiser after cruiser. He turned on his heels, facing his adjutant, pointing out of the bridge’s window. “How come none of the others fire at Voltron anymore?!” 

The man addressed saluted. “Sir, all other ships have been strategically disabled. They’re virtually useless!” 

“Wha-why?”, Taika yelled, “We’re supposed to be the victors here! And where all the fighter jets?”   
“Sir, you sent all of them into combat three doboshes ago already!” 

“Why? How?”, Taika screamed back, bordering on hysteria. His adjutant took a glance at his datapad. “Sir!”, he said a moment later, “The fleet’s integrity has fallen below 10%! We should evacuate now!” “How dare you-“ An explosion rocked the crew sideward. 

Taika groaned and pushed himself upwards on a console. A panel of the ceiling crashed down right in front of him. He shrieked and covered his mouth immediately afterwards. 

“What was that?”, he demanded. 

His adjutant looked up from the ground where he was sprawled out, datapad besides him. “Sir!”, he said, “Two Lions of Voltron have latched onto our ship! We’re being boarded by Paladins!” 

“How many? And which Paladins exactly?” 

“Two Paladins, Sir! The Green and the…Pink one?” 

“There’s no Pink Paladin, you imbecile! Which Lions, then?” 

“The Blue and the Green Lion, Sir!” 

“So the Green and the Blue Paladin it is! Apprehend them!” 

The sentries present stormed out of the room. Or they tried to, at least. 

Not even the first robot made it through the door that suddenly closed without warning. The first sentry was cut in half, the next just ran into each other, forming a pile of artificial limbs and torsos on the ground. 

Taika giggled at the display. This was definitely his end, be it his life or his career. High Command would so kick his ass, he didn’t dare imagine. 

“Sir!”, his adjutant’s voice got him back to the situation at hand. “What should we do? The entire ship has been closed off like this! The Paladins have free reign!” 

Taika giggled again. “Plot a collision course with the Lions out there!”, he screamed, pointing at the continuous explosions visible from the bridge. 

The navigator saluted, went to work-or rather, tried to. 

They all heard it, the laughter, and suddenly, some…caricature (?) danced around on the screens of every console in the room… 

“What is this?!”, Captain Taika asked, screamed, yelled, hyperventilating. 

The navigator punched his work station. “I can’t access a thing! We’ve been completely hacked, Sir!” 

Taika put his head in his hands. 

But then, an epiphany hit him. 

He started laughing, loudly, openly. He raised his arms. “This is it!”, he declared, sparks, dust and flickering screens around him. He put a fist to his chest. “It’s been an honor serving with you! Vrepit sa!” 

The crew glanced at him incredulously for just a moment before repeating his movements. “Vrepit sa!” 

Taika giggled once more, sitting down on the ground. “Now let’s see what the Paladins have in store for us!” 

A tick later, the weird caricature disappeared, and only then did Captain Taika recognize that it should represent a head…with short hair and big round glasses. He frowned, but it was of little importance. 

They’d die anyway; out of Victory or Death, it was Death for them. 

Another shock rocked through the bridge. 

“Sir!”, his adjutant reported one last time, “The Paladins have left the ship in their Lions. Our data base…it’s gone! They’ve stolen it!” 

Taika waved dismissively. “They shall have it! They’ve won this battle, and if this is what they choose as their prize, so be it!” 

Then, he noticed the Black Lion rising up face to face with the bridge. He couldn’t control his laughing again. “We’re gonna die anyway! Look!” 

The crew stared out of the window. 

“Oh quiznack…”, someone said before a bright light engulfed them.


	41. Data

“Whoo, that was something!”, Lance cheered, adrenaline high slowly ebbing away after the heated battle they’d just finished. 

Pidge grumbled. “They just gave up in the end!”, she argued. 

Lance chuckled. “Come on, you’re just down because hacking them took longer than usual.” 

Pidge grumbled even louder. “They had pretty good encryption, I’ll give them that…” 

Lance laughed and poked at her side. 

Why he was so happy? Well, they’d just gotten yet another step closer to Keith! 

Through some calculations, they had found out the fleet they just defeated had directly come from the location of Zarkon’s command ship, and because of some complicated data backup method whose explanation Lance had tuned out halfway through, the flagship of said fleet was bound to have all transmissions of the last three days that had been exchanged in the vicinity of Zarkon’s command ship stored in its database.

And since the transponder of Keith’s pod indicated he was still somewhere on that ship, it was likely Keith was still there as well, which meant that if Keith had conversed with anyone there, that transmission could be found somewhere in the mountain of data they’d just stolen. 

At least they hoped that was the case, as it seemed that only the more unimportant transmissions were outsourced like this. 

Pidge took off with the data immediately after disembarking her Lion. 

Not really up to following her, Lance had nothing to do but to kick up his heels and ponder the increasingly strange situation he found himself in. 

Really, what was up with Red these days? One moment, they were fighting Galra or even just chilling in the Castle, and the next, Red would roar and project that strange sense of urgency and, well…Keith into his mind. 

Then, she’d proceed to just push him to get up, do something, get Keith back. 

Lance found it mysterious, to say the least. And every time, there was no more to do than say “Red, we’re on it already!” 

But that was seemingly not enough for her, as she would continue urging Lance towards working harder than he could have ever imagined being possible. 

After reading Keith’s diary, Lance could only ever wonder whether that was how Keith felt, being under constant pressure, be it by a 10.000-year-old sentient mecha-lion, cruel foster families, the Garrison, or, hell, even Team Voltron itself.

A few hours later, when the team had dispersed in their usual manner-Allura and Coran on the bridge, Shiro on the training deck, Hunk in the kitchen, Pidge in her room, probably decoding the stolen information and Lance in the lounge-Pidge stormed into the latter, startling Lance out of his thinking. 

He had just realized how good they had actually worked together today when Pidge barreled past him, waving a datapad around and screaming “Follow me!”. 

Lance flinched, then jumped up and ran after her. “What’s that?”, he asked while the two sprinted through the Castle towards the bridge. 

“You’ll see when we’re there!”, Pidge answered ominously. 

Lance frowned while they picked up Hunk, who had just come out of the kitchen and then Shiro who had just ended a training unit. Together, the four Paladins then arrived at the bridge, startling Coran and Allura out of a discussion about the interpretation of some sensor values.

“Hello Paladins, what can we do for you?”, asked Coran, ever the helpful old man. Everyone took a moment to catch their breaths, meanwhile Pidge showed them the datapad. 

“I…”, Pidge wheezed, “found something. A transmission. I just picked it…because of the thumbnail…so it could be something…entirely different…”, Pidge inhaled deeply, trying to regain control over her breathing, “but I think he wasn’t exactly welcomed…as a prisoner.” 

Lance’s stomach twisted uncomfortably. No. That…not as a prisoner? “Play it!”, he begged. 

Now, that would’ve been an excellent opportunity to mock Lance, but Pidge just nodded and connected the datapad to the main terminal. 

The screen lit up, divided into two parts; the split-screen adjusted itself so the image wouldn’t be distorted. 

Then the video started.


	42. A video and a vow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMPORTANT QUESTION:
> 
> How long does a fandom of a show that's finished typically survive/go on?
> 
> I'm asking because I'm really anxious that since this fic will take quite some time to finish, I'll be the last one still posting anything here about Voltron. Though that should have no impact on me finishing this story (and it won't have), I'd really like to know! Thanks in advance!

The left screen showed Keith and only now did Lance realize how hurt his…friend (Lance still couldn’t settle on a satisfying way to call Keith) really had been. 

His usual scowl wasn’t just downturned, it was somber, maybe even straight-up dark, as if, below all the hurt, some kind of twisted determination had already found its place in Keith’s mind. His eyes were red-rimmed, his cheeks stained with drying tears and his nose…God, Lance had completely forgotten about that and he couldn’t help but feel guilty. 

A quick glance sideward to the Yellow Paladin revealed that Hunk looked just as guilty as Lance felt, maybe even more, and Lance could’ve sworn to have heard a quiet “Sorry, Keith.”

The right screen showed a Galra. A captain, according to the insignia on his chest-plate. He looked like an everyday representative of the species, though Lance couldn’t tell what that exactly was supposed to look like, considering that each Galra seemed to be of another race than the next. But, well, the Captain looked ordinary enough to not make a permanent place for himself in Lance’s memory. 

Though his words might change just that.

“This is Captain Verak of the Eternal Empire. Identify yourself and state your intentions!”, the Captain-Verak-barked.

Keith smiled, a light, bitter expression that didn’t even reach his eyes. 

Lance averted his gaze for a second. 

He had put that smile there and God, Lance never wanted to see it on Keith again. In that moment, he vowed that starting now, he’d bring Keith nothing but happiness. It sounded strange, cheesy, impossible even, but if Lance had one thing, it was resolve, be it nagging someone until they went ballistic (he grimaced when he remembered the latest example of that), defeating the Galra and then getting home, or, as of now, getting Keith back. 

Lance’s head swiveled back when he heard Keith’s answer.

“Greetings, Captain Verak. I am Keith Kogane. I am…was the Red Paladin of Voltron and I wish to strike a deal with your emperor.” 

A deal? Lance’s stomach acted up. Please. No.

“I must inquire, Red Paladin-if I can even call you that-what kind of deal?”, Verak asked after a tick of silence.

Keith’s smile didn’t wane. Lance hated it.

“Voltron has rejected me, and now that I have defected, I found that if I am not allowed to save the universe, I might as well destroy it. Which, at the same time, is the only thing I seem to be good at. I intend to join you.” 

Lance had to physically hold himself back from gagging. “No, please.”, he whispered, powerless against the scene unfolding itself in front of him. 

It mercilessly continued.

“An interesting, but welcome way of thinking, young Kogane. Stay on course, our tractor beam will guide you. Emperor Zarkon will be notified of your arrival. Vrepit sa!” 

The screen went out and left a shocked Team Voltron behind. Everybody stayed still for a moment, staring at the screen, silently waiting for someone else to do the first move. 

Which came from Lance, as he started sobbing into his hands, not realizing he had sunk to the ground, not understanding why he was even crying. 

He was also the first one to really catch himself. He looked up to the team. “G-Guys…”, he began, “We-we could meet Keith in battle…and not even know it.” He swallowed, and another realization hit him. “We could kill him and not even know!”

That shocked everyone out of their trance. 

Suddenly, the bridge was abuzz with movement once more. 

Hunk moved to put his arms around Lance, comforting him, Pidge shimmied over to the her terminal, trying to find more, anything about Keith, his location or whatever would help them find him, Allura went to help her, Coran dashed off towards the medbay and the archive of the ship, respectively trying to gather information and Shiro stood amidst that chaos and tried to bring some reason into it.

When the lights began to dim, everybody looked up, then at each other, and nodded. It was going to be a hectic night.


	43. Experiments

When Ke’Ith got his new assignment, he didn’t exactly know what to think. Since neither introspection nor observation were his strong points, he guessed feeling the Quintessence around him was just as hard as feeling his own…

Yet here he was again, hovering in the air, meditating, but this time with his eyes open. 

Not too late after he’d begun this exercise, the world around him had blurred and the colors had become more intense, some of the latter had even changed altogether. 

It reminded Ke’Ith a bit of thermal, maybe infrared vision, and he wondered whether what he was seeing had anything to do with what he was supposed to be doing right now. 

Also, weren’t these exercises supposed to be draining? And if yes, why was he feeling better, stronger, more alive by the second?

As time went on, Ke’Ith inevitably got bored. Don’t get him wrong, he was genuinely interested in becoming a Druid, it was a nice change of pace from being a sword-fighter as well as mysterious and challenging in a refreshingly new way. 

But these long waits, no matter how important for honing his abilities, were slowly making him grow impatient. He wanted something to happen.

So he started experimenting. With his own Quintessence and the one around him. After all, the High Priestess had hinted that he could very well surpass her, and since he didn’t know her full power, he was driven to find out what he could do she couldn’t.

First, he turned his close attention to his surroundings. 

In Quintessence Vision, or however this was called, most inanimate things looked about the same, though the air seemed slightly yellow dotted, as if there were many small and barely visible fireflies crowding the room. 

Ke’Ith reached out -he wasn’t sure whether in the physical or metaphorical sense- and seized one of these ‘fireflies’. 

Up close, they didn’t look any different; just a small concentration of Quintessence; Ke’Ith let it go. Maybe he could something with these small pockets?

The High Priestess had yet to show him how to really channel Quintessence, so Ke’Ith guessed it was trial and error for now. 

Well, he only needed his imagination and inherent talent, so he went to work.

He first willed the pockets of Quintessence to slowly drift towards the center of the room, forming one big orb. They obliged with a seeming eagerness sheer energy shouldn’t possess, but Ke’Ith didn’t care much. 

In its own way, this was mesmerizing; for the life of him, Ke’Ith wouldn’t be able to tell why exactly, but to have this pure energy so completely under his control and be able to mold it into whatever he wanted to, was capturing, almost addictive.

Ke’Ith let the softly glowing orb hover around a little, circling the middle of the room, illuminating the training room as if performing a light show just for him. 

Ke’Ith chuckled lightly and noticed himself relaxing more and more; this was nice. 

He disbanded the orb afterwards and focused himself on the small particles of Quintessence. He willed some of them to fly in formation, weaving complex patterns into the air, sometimes utilizing more, sometimes utilizing less particles. 

Maybe he could color them too?

He could, he found out a moment later; he just had to think it. So now he had the entire color scheme assembled in the room, blinking, color-changing, moving particles. 

It looked like a disco ball, but with much more variety. Ke’Ith concentrated the particles into a ball a tick later, then making the entire thing spin. God, this was fabulous! Ke’Ith began laughing.

Then he disbanded the orb again, changing the colors back to the regular Quintessence-yellow. Maybe this had some more practical uses too. Since he could create disco ball and change the color of Quintessence itself at will, maybe he could…

Ke’Ith closed his eyes, tried to focus and think of himself. 

Yes, a perfect copy. 

He could feel the Quintessence around him shifting. When it had come to a halt, Ke’Ith opened his eyes again. 

And he saw…himself. In his Druid robes. Hovering in the air like he did currently. 

A perfect copy indeed. 

He willed the illusion to tilt back its head, and it complied without fail, without delay. Then, he let the illusion sink down to the ground and assume a battle stance. He willed it to perform some warmup exercises and kept watching. 

It looked so real, it felt so real…

Ke’Ith lifted his clone off the ground and willed it to mirror him reaching out. Their fingertips met…and then their hands, then their arms. Ke’Ith jerked back. 

It was just Quintessence; there was no matter to back up his clone. 

But he had already seen Quintessence in liquid form, so there’d have to be a solid form too, shouldn’t it? Ke’Ith willed his illusion to be solid and reached out again.

Amazing. It had worked. 

This time, his clone felt like a real living being beneath his fingers. It may not have been warm to touch, and Ke’Ith didn’t feel a heartbeat…but he changed that just one thought later.

Now it really was a perfect copy.

Ke’Ith summoned a copy of his knife for his clone next. Maybe he could let it do some fighting? 

“Computer?”, he let his clone ask. 

“Yes?”, came the monotonous answer from the training room’s AI who apparently saw no difference between the illusion and a real living being. 

“Do you have something akin to a training program for fighters that I could utilize right now?”, his clone asked next. 

“From an array of 100 difficulty levels, 5 different enemies, up to 10 enemies at once and dozens of different weapons, I can offer you the some of the finest training the Empire could possibly hope to have.” 

Ke’Ith narrowed his eyes. Did the AI just sound proud while saying that? Well, whatever. He shrugged it off. “What would Difficulty Level 1 be like and what weapon would you recommend me to fight against?”, he let his illusion ask lastly. 

“Difficulty Level 1 would equal the standard Galran soldier. Seeing that you have equipped a short-range weapon, I’d recommend a long-range weapon such as the standard energy rifle, the whip or the chain sickle.”, came the prompt answer. 

“Very well.”, Ke’Ith’s illusion finalized the conversation at his will, “Start training program. Difficulty Level 1. Standard energy rifle.” 

“As you wish.” 

The fight started a moment later when a sentry dropped from the ceiling, an energy rifle in its hands. It began firing as soon as its feet hit the ground.

The fight didn’t last long. 

Actually, it had taken Ke’Ith, or rather, his illusion, not even half a minute to beat the training sentry and he had been going very easy on it. 

To be honest, Ke’Ith wasn’t even surprised. He’d already seen Galran soldiers training and in action, and both hadn’t been to impressive. Additionally, it seemed that his illusion wasn’t bound by the same restrictions his real body was. 

Ke’Ith hadn’t really had time to explore the last fact to sufficience, but it appeared he could turn things like gravity, visibility and such on and off as he willed it for his clone. Also, he could see through the eyes of his copy; the potential usefulness of that only dawned on him a few minutes later.

While contemplating what he could try next, Ke’Ith was suddenly overcome by a vision. It was him…chained to a chair, somebody standing in front of him, a group of people bursting through the doors behind his captor or whoever it was.  
But wait. Didn’t he already know this vision? No…That had been a similar one, where he’d been the person in the middle…

What was happening to his future?

Ke’Ith took a few minutes to calm down and try to process the vision. It was a vision, of that he was sure, and it was an altered version of the one he’d seen previously, but what could it mean?

When half an hour had passed without Ke’Ith being able to determine anything solid about his vision, he gave up on wracking his brain. The only way to experience or change his future was to survive until then, wasn’t it?

So Ke’Ith resumed his experiments.


	44. Draining (family life)

Haggar hurried through the corridors of the Eternal Empire towards the training room where she believed Ke’Ith to be. She hoped he was still there after the vargas she’d spent away from him, fulfilling the numerous other tasks being the High Priestess of the Druid Order brought with it, though she couldn’t imagine he’d wandered off, seeing as his father’s sense for duty coursed through his veins. 

Haggar allowed herself the tiniest of smiles. Her son had a bright future ahead of him, that much she could tell. Especially now that more results of the tests they had conducted on Ke’Ith from afar had arrived. He couldn’t just singlehandedly charge the Komar, he could do so a few times in a row-granted he took a small pause after each time. 

The more she learned about her son, the prouder Haggar was. Somehow, Ke’Ith combined everything in himself she’d wished for in Lotor. Not to say her first son wasn’t smart or talented, but he was so in his own way. Now that wasn’t a bad thing either, Haggar just sometimes wished he’d be a little more…obliging, but she doubted that goal was still reachable. 

If she hadn’t rejected her first son so early, maybe their relationship wouldn’t have gone bad like this, but here they were. She sighed and tried to pay less mind to the things she couldn’t outright change. Lotor had his own stubborn will, maybe Ke’Ith could help get through to him…

It was when she had almost reached the training room her apprentice trained in when she noticed something about the air. The air on the Eternal Empire was unusually stale, yes, but this? It felt like she was inhaling desert sand! And was the interior around here always this…greyed out? 

Looking further ahead, Haggar found a crumpled form on the ground right next to the right wall. She strode closer. A sentry lay there, deactivated. No, not just deactivated, she couldn’t feel this sentry in the Quintessence Field at all; it had been completely drained of its Quintessence! 

It dawned on Haggar just a split-tick later. Though, this strong? Pushing aside the feeling of slowly being drained herself, she carried on towards the training room.


	45. Godlike

Another few hours passed as Ke’Ith performed his exercises and experiments. 

It seemed he couldn’t just turn his illusion invisible, but also himself, although the latter was limited in terms of time. Furthermore, he could turn off or even reverse gravity for himself too, meaning he could walk on the ceiling or the walls and make it look completely normal. And he found out he could use the orb from earlier like a throwing weapon. 

On that note, he could generate any kind of weapon for himself from Quintessence, be it his knife, any knife, swords, guns or the more exotic weapons. 

In all the time he’d spent experimenting, he’d also determined that he was feeling so good, better by the second even, because he was using the Quintessence around him exclusively, slowly draining his surroundings. 

He’d already tried using his own Quintessence, but that was exhausting. Too exhausting for Ke’Ith to believe the Druids did use only their own Quintessence. It made little sense compared to what powers the Druids appeared to possess. 

But, well, Ke’Ith himself was supposed to be the strongest of them all, maybe he was just a bit special.

Oh, and he could bend the elements!

Then finally, the High Priestess came by; Ke’Ith knew she had other responsibilities beside him, so he wasn’t too annoyed she’d let him wait for hours. 

That was how Haggar found him. Standing on the ceiling, colored sparks of Quintessence dancing around him, the air around him completely greyed out and devoid and Quintessence. The Galran High Priestess’ stride broke for a moment as she stood there, awed and surprised. She raised an eyebrow. And waited. For a short moment. Then she ordered “Come down here, Ke’Ith.”, gesturing accordingly. 

Ah, quiznack. She didn’t sound exactly happy. Nonetheless, Ke’Ith complied, sunk to the ground and bowed his head respectfully, waiting for Haggar to continue. 

“Before we talk any further, would you please stop draining everything around you?” The High Priestess held her glare as Ke’Ith returned the Quintessence sparks around him to their normal color and let them roam free. In a burst of color did the room regain its Quintessence. 

Then, Haggar’s glare softened into an expression of pure amazement. “How did you do that?”, she asked, sounding almost like an overexcited child. 

“Did what?”, Ke’Ith asked back dumbfoundedly. “That…”, Haggar gestured awkwardly, “Everything! Regarding purposeful manipulation of Quintessence, you shouldn’t even be able to get it to move…yet you’re here, having reversed gravity and coloring Quintessence itself! That last part practically makes you a god!” Ke’Ith was…more than just taken aback by the High Priestess outburst. 

“Okay, uhh…”, he responded absolutely eloquent, “Why? And I…can do some other things too?” 

“You…”, Haggar seemed unsure what to do first, order him to continue showing his newfound skills or explain herself.

She chose the latter. “The scientific name for Druid magic may be Quintessence Manipulation, but it’s really just matter and space we manipulate using Quintessence. But you…you can manipulate Quintessence itself. I told you that the only limit is your imagination, and well, for you it seems to be; for us other Druids our limits regarding Quintessence channeling still count-”

Sudden silence. For a long moment. Then, Haggar’s face twisted in the most terrifying manner, so fast Ke’Ith had no chance to see it coming. He violently flinched back, his teeth clicking shut. What the… 

“High Priestess?”, he asked, stretching out an arm. 

Haggar waved dismissively, fear etched deeply into her expression. “Computer!”, she called the room’s AI. “Yes?”, came the monotonous counter question. “Delete all footage and data of both me and Ke’Ith since he reentered this training room a few vargas ago until the two of us exit and the door is fully closed!”, Haggar ordered and dragged Ke’Ith with her. 

“As you wish.”, the computer said as its control panel on the wall lit up briefly. 

Ke’Ith couldn’t help himself anymore after that. He dug his heels into the ground, forcefully stopping his mother and himself, almost toppling the two of them over in the process. “Seriously, mom, what’s going on?”, he asked, exasperated and confused. 

His mother stumbled a few steps ahead, then turned back to him. “Not now!”, she snapped, “This has to wait until we’ve reached somewhere safe!” She began dragging him along again, and this time Ke’Ith didn’t put up any resistance, although still confused.


	46. Hiding (in more ways than one)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the butchered update schedule! School has begun again and I'm struggling a bit to fit all of the work AND writing into the same day! But no worries, I think I'll manage (even if that means I can't upload a chapter every single day)!
> 
> By the way, would someone care to give me a general review of the story? Just so I know what I should capitalize upon and what still needs improvement!

Dragged and guided by Haggar, Ke’Ith stumbled after her through long winding corridors, past personnel who looked just as confused as Ke’Ith felt as he and the High Priestess hurried past them. 

Just a bit later, Ke’Ith could guess where they were going based on their course; it seemed they were returning to the Druid’s quarters. 

Actually, they were not exactly returning to the quarters, they’d rather just been going in the general direction, but Ke’Ith only realized that when Haggar directed them into a dark storage room in an unused corridor.

The two Druids took a moment to catch their breath, wheezing from the de-facto-sprint they’d just completed.

“So…”, Ke’Ith began, “What the quiznack, mom?” 

“Language!”, Honerva scolded, toning down her voice. 

Ke’Ith rolled his eyes and sighed.

His mother looked around the dark room packed with crates, canisters and boxes of all kinds and sizes, slowly scanning it. She stopped turning when she spotted something. 

Before Ke’Ith had time to protest, he was pulled deeper into the room, into a small alcove between some crates. Honerva let herself down slowly, motioning Ke’Ith to do the same. He sat down next to his mother, still confused and upset.

Ke’Ith took a deep breath, but sensing his intention to speak up again, his mother raised a hand, silencing him before he’d began. 

So Ke’Ith sighed and waited.

“The Emperor must never know your true power, you hear me?!”, Honerva suddenly emphasized, laying a hand on his shoulder and shaking him. 

“Wha-why?”, Ke’Ith asked back, not understanding where his mother was suddenly coming from. “If I’m really a god like you say, I could save people out there!”, he argued, “I could-“ 

His mother silenced him once again by squeezing his shoulder. “You can and will save people, but not like this.”, Honerva whispered, making Ke’Ith go still to be able to understand her mumbling. “The Emperor is a good person, but you must never trigger his lust for power and Quintessence.”, she continued, “If you do that, and your powers will, trust me, there’s no holding back for him.” 

She took a shaky breath. “If he catches on to your true power, he will abuse it. He will abuse you. You may be able to channel limitless amounts of Quintessence, but only theoretically so. It will ruin you if you were to be forced to constantly use your full power. Take this...” 

With that, Honerva reached into her robes, searching for something. Ke’Ith could see her hands working beneath her cloak, and frowned, his brows creasing with obvious curiosity and a bit of caution.

It took her some time to find what she’d been looking for, but in the end, it wasn’t too long until Honerva pulled a pendant from her robes. It was a small white crystal held by a simple steel socket on a band so brown it was almost black. “It’s a Limiter.”, his mom explained in response to Ke’Ith’s questioning gaze and tilted head, “It retains a certain part of your powers, meaning that you can still execute all your spells, just with lessened force. It will help you hide yourself from the Emperor’s greed.” 

Ke’Ith reluctantly accepted the pendant, taking it into his hand, weighing it. It wasn’t very heavy, it weighed almost nothing to be honest, but Ke’Ith could already feel its effects. Just holding the pendant made him feel like he was wearing a shirt one size too small. 

“It has to be that way.”, his mother stated, sensing his thoughts. 

Ke’Ith nodded. He hadn’t really anticipated anything else. This pendant was meant to be restricting, after all. He put it on.

Honerva smiled at that, but not much more than faintly. “We don’t have much more time before somebody will become suspicious regarding our whereabouts. Will you let me read your mind so we can speed this up?” 

Ke’Ith shrugged nonchalantly. “Go ahead.”

Following his permission, Honerva put a hand to Ke’Ith’s forehead and began filing through his memories; this time the more recent ones. She took a good look at his experiments from earlier and how he had perceived the ongoing day. She also lingered rather long on his thoughts, the things he had pondered, hoped for and decided to do in the future.

They sat like this for a while; in truth, it wasn’t more than a minute, yet Honerva learned many things about her son. She also noted the unformed and unasked questions in his mind. 

Those and the conscious ones she was about to answer when she’d finished her mindreading, but then the door to the storage room slid open and a dark figure sneaked in.


	47. A revealing report

Honerva froze where she sat, hand still on Ke’Ith’s forehead, eyes open wide. Had somebody found them? Had their short run been to obvious in its destination? Or its purpose? She cursed herself for being this careless and wanted to get up, but Ke’Ith vehemently urged her to hold on through their mental link, so strongly that Honerva winced slightly. 

The two Druids pressed themselves deeper into their alcove, almost melting completely into the shadows. The dark figure hurriedly passed their hiding spot, the clanking of armor and the figure’s leanness showing that it was not a Druid, but a member of the military. What were they doing here?

Ke’Ith seemed to have reached about the same conclusion as he broadcasted “Military. Belong. Not here.” to Honerva a moment later. She nodded in accordance. “Wait. And see.”, Ke’Ith then insisted.

Thace knew he had to be quick. He had time off right now, but no prolonged disappearance went unnoticed. And so he avoided his usual abodes, choosing to relay his transmission in a storage room he knew was rarely used, almost forsaken. 

Straying from his normal route, Thace made his way towards the room, communicator clenched in his fist, Blade of Marmora hidden under his armor, but prepared to be drawn at a moment’s notice. 

To be honest, there wasn’t much to report to the Blade; his research into the matter of the fallen Red Paladin had met an earlier end than expected. 

On the entire ship, there was no one named Keith, and only a handful with similar names. All of which he could dismiss because they were either full-blooded Galra or prisoners of entirely different species. 

All but one, actually. 

And this one was Ke’Ith. The Druid Thace had already met personally; which was also the only way Thace even knew about him. 

Though his genetic makeup didn’t fit the Red Paladin’s description. 

Wasn’t he supposed to be Half-Galra and Half-Human, so to say two species?

Well, Thace thought it better to report this than nothing at all. There were virtually no other leads on his case, and although the Blade normally did not rely on chances and rumors, they’d have to do it this time. 

Then he arrived and quickly ducked into the storage room.

Ke’Ith and Honerva watched as the soldier stowed himself away into a corner of the room. They couldn’t exactly see him there unless they wanted to risk exposing themselves, but they could listen, having noticed the figure was carrying something that looked like a communicator. What could be important or secret enough to have to be relayed from here?

They found out when the soldier, judging by his tone of voice, a man, started talking.

“Thace reporting to the Blade of Marmora.” Ke’Ith could just barely hold himself back from gasping. So Thace really belonged with these…traitors! Then his hunch hadn’t been wrong!

“Thace. What is it?”, the person on the other end of the transmission asked, and Ke’Ith’s memory reminded him that this sounded like the leader of the Blades, Kolivan. 

He narrowed his eyes and continued eavesdropping. 

“My research regarding the Red Paladin has come to an early end.” 

The Red Paladin…that was him! Or at least had been him…

Ke’Ith narrowly avoided growling. Were the Paladins that desperate for a slave? 

“There is only one lead I have.”, Thace continued. 

“And that lead entails what?”, Kolivan asked. Thace answered hastily, “Ke’Ith. A Druid I met personally. Though he said of himself to belong to three species instead of the supposed two.” 

“Is that-“, everything, Kolivan had wanted to ask, but he was interrupted by a growling sound.

When Thace heard the growling, he knew he wasn’t alone. After a rushed “I’ll call back in time!” he terminated his connection to the Blade’s headquarters and drew his blade so fast it looked like it just jumped into his hand. He crouched down and assumed a battle stance, straining his ears, but there were no more sounds. 

Had he misheard? 

Carefully, and ever so slowly, he skulked forwards to where he thought to have heard the sound from. Thace narrowed his eyes and readied himself for anything and everything.


	48. A fight, a flight, an impending chase

Ke’Ith knew when he messed up. And right now, he had done exactly that. 

Quiznack. 

He hadn’t wanted to growl, really, it accidentally slipped out of him. He just couldn’t hold back when the two Blades continued talking about him as if he weren’t there, as if he were a damsel in distress. And when Thace mentioned his confusion over Ke’Ith’s three heritages, Ke’Ith just…growled. 

It was dumb, but that had been his mistake.

His mother had frozen once more, and initially, so had Ke’Ith. 

But when he heard Thace coming closer and closer, he forced himself out of his rigid posture. “Quiet. Surprise attack.”, he broadcasted to Honerva through their mental link, summoning a dagger into his right hand without the usual flash of Quintessence. 

His mother nodded and moved herself now, ready to attack. 

And so they sat there, crouched, ready, waiting out the last agonizing seconds before what would doubtlessly become a full-fledged fight.

Thace knew when to trust his gut. And right now, his guts told him he’d have to fight for his very life in a few ticks. A fact which did absolutely not delight him. 

He’d been found out, it seemed. By whom, he’d see that in a moment.

Wait.

He could’ve sworn he’d heard shuffling from an alcove in between the mountains of crates and boxes…

He ducked right next to the alcove, took a deep but inaudible breath, gripped his blade just a little tighter, shifted his stance a bit, blinked fast twice, then whirled around.

Thace came around the corner and Ke’Ith pushed himself upwards with all his might, dagger directed forward, aimed at Thace, intended to end this with one strike. 

But the Blade of Marmora sidestepped him in the last moment possible, sending him crashing into the opposite wall with no more than a simple push on the back. A crate the height of his waist dug painfully into him, making Ke’Ith hiss. 

He slumped over the box, firmly trying to blink back the tears, fighting the pain struggling to paralyze him. Behind him he heard the sounds of continuous fighting, the cracking of his mother’s Quintessence lightning, the swishing of her teleporting, Thace’s grunting and his blade cutting through empty air; he sounded desperate to escape this fighting. 

Grinning, but still grimacing, Ke’Ith turned around, taking in the sight before him. 

His mother was everywhere, striking from every angle imaginable; from the front, the back, from below, above, the left, the right, shooting Quintessence lightning and summoning illusions. 

Though in this limited and small space, it was obvious Honerva couldn’t utilize her full potential. And Ke’Ith began seeing a pattern in her attacks too; one Thace hadn’t figured out yet and Ke’Ith could integrate himself into easily. 

He looked around, finding his dagger on the floor next to the crate he’d slumped onto. Picking up the weapon and weighing it in his hand, he waited for an opportunity to join the fight. 

It came when Thace had his back turned to Ke’Ith. Steeling himself, briefly pressing a hand to his aching side, Ke’Ith jumped into action again.

Thace didn’t hear him coming, saw him much less. It must’ve been luck. 

Again, in the last possible moment, he turned around to evade one of Honerva’s Quintessence blasts and saw Ke’Ith in the process. Ke’Ith who’d just approached with his dagger raised.

Quiznack. 

Not again. 

Ke’Ith knew he stood no chance in a longer fight against a fully trained Blade of Marmora, that much had already became obvious after the first repartee. He was just a Druid apprentice, his powers had little to no use in real combat, not to mention he’d never used them in it before either. 

He tried a high blow. And was blocked promptly. 

Thace responded with a low blow that almost cost Ke’Ith his abdomen had he not leaned back in time. 

Already in the in the defense after only one exchange of blows, Ke’Ith jumped back, into a more open space in the storage room. He elongated his dagger into a sword.

And Thace…did the same. His blade glowed purple, the color swallowing the whole weapon and then it suddenly was thrice as long. Damn it, these Blades really had too many aces up their sleeves. 

Regardless, Ke’Ith worked up his courage once more and attacked. He would not lose! Victory or Death!

Ke’Ith stormed forward, swinging his sword in a wide arc, so fast it blurred. 

This time, Thace barely had time to block. His blade faltered inwards towards where Ke’Ith had wanted to strike in a more than dangerous manner. 

Ke’Ith continued, letting the Quintessence guide him. He let his sword scrape along the length of Thace’s blade, downwards, downwards, downwards…Just before contact between their weapons ceased, Ke’Ith let his stray, into Thace’s side. 

But his sword just scratched the armor’s paint. 

Ke’Ith jumped back again and growled. He’d landed a hit, but a useless one. Then Thace went into the offensive again, catching Ke’Ith by surprise.

Thace tried a frontal stab, Ke’Ith evaded, right into his mother who’d just teleported behind them, Thace pushed them over and the two Druids tumbled onto the ground in a tangle of limbs. 

Ke’Ith growled and tried to free himself as he heard Thace sprinting past them, a door swishing open, then closing and fast footfall rapidly distancing itself from the storage room.

Honerva teleported herself out from under Ke’Ith, pulling him up to his feet the next moment. “After him!”, Ke’Ith snarled; the two stormed out of the room.


	49. Overcharge

The change of scenery didn’t do Ke’Ith and Honerva much good. 

At least not immediately. Striding into the light, they were blinded, their eyes watering, the world blurring, all their pain flaring up again. 

Ke’Ith grunted and clutched at his side. Quiznack. The fight had taken more out of him than he’d hoped it had.

Ke’Ith fervently shook his head. This was not the time to dwell on his weaknesses. He straightened himself up, clearing his vision with a swipe over his eyes. In the distance, he could hear clanging, grunting and shooting, metal on metal, heavy boots on steel floor. 

Without a second thought, he chased after the sounds, jumping over the sentries scattered everywhere, slashed and lacerated, victims of the rampaging Blade.

The sounds were growing closer and closer, but suddenly Haggar cursed and stopped right in her tracks. Before Ke’Ith had the chance to ask, she said, “I know where he’s going!”, eyes open wide in an expression of realization, hurry and caution. 

Ke’Ith stopped a few steps ahead of the High Priestess. “What is it? Where’s he going?”

The silence on her part as Haggar began sprinting past him, chasing Thace anew, told him almost everything he needed to know. The rest Ke’Ith got to know a tick later as Haggar began explaining without breaking her sprint in the slightest. 

“He plans to overload the Solar Barrier! Whereas its generator normally forms a bubble, the blast from overloading it will turn the entire star system and everything in it to dust! The Emperor must be warned! I trust you with this!” 

With that, she teleported away, leaving Ke’Ith to stop Thace. He didn’t even slow down, just nodding and sprinting on.

This was not what Thace had expected to happen today. Not at all. How could he have been this careless? Well, quiznack it. Fussing over things he couldn’t change was not what would bring the Empire to its knees.

Sliding, ducking, jumping, he made his way for the generator room of the Solar Barrier, mowing down the sentries in his path. Thankfully the sector was off-limits for most organic personnel, otherwise this would’ve been much more of a mess.

Just before arriving, Thace was intercepted by a group of sentries. They had surely been alerted via the intercom channel all sentries seemed to share, but the otherwise more than lackluster security made Thace wonder whether the Empire was slowly growing old and arrogant…

He quickly disposed of these sentries too, storming inside the room, locking the door, destroying the sentry operating the generator, typed in a few commands, martially hacked through a firewall, opened a comms channel to both the Blade’s headquarters and the Castle of Lions, then settled back as Kolivan and the Paladins appeared on screen, demanding to know what was happening, all the while the generator behind the massive screens began glowing brighter and brighter, overloading.

“Thace! What is happening?”, Kolivan was the first to ask. The Paladins backed him up with shouts of their own. 

Thace strained his ears for a moment, listening for sounds outside of the generator room. There was nothing to be heard. The Empire really was slow these days. Thace began explaining a second later. “Since the Paladins are here too-“

“Black alert!”, Captain Verak’s voice sounded through the intercom, “Commander Thace is a Blade of Marmora! He has barricaded himself within the generator room of the Solar Barrier and is currently overloading the system! Evacuate immediately!” 

Following the announcement, there were no sounds to be heard for just a little longer than appropriate, Thace’s neutral, slightly annoyed and tired expression silencing them all. 

“There you have it.”, the discovered agent then said. 

Silence for another moment. 

Again, Kolivan was the first to respond. “I see.”, he stated, just as neutral as Thace, “Is there anything else to report?” 

Thace cast a glance towards the Paladins. They were listening intently, knowing he had something found something on his search for Keith. “To sum it up, no, there’s nothing else to report.”, Thace answered, “As I already told you, there’s one lead I uncovered. Ke’Ith.” 

Another glance to the Paladins revealed that the Blue Paladin had furrowed his brows, frowning. “Now that sounds just like a cheap parody of Keith’s name.”, he said, not sure whether to himself or the people gathered around. 

“It is a valid Galran name though.”, Thace argued, “It’s meaning is ‘a force to be reckoned with’, in case you were wondering.” 

“Oh.”, the Blue Paladin huffed, then his expression cleared into a soft smile, “Sounds just like him!” 

In the background Thace could see the Green Paladin raising an eyebrow to her companion, questioningly, knowingly, smugly, he couldn’t tell. So he shrugged it off. 

And winced when the alarm started ringing.

“Solar Barrier overload imminent. Sixty ticks remaining. Please evacuate immediately.”

Everyone heard the announcement, not just Thace, not just Kolivan, not just the Paladins.

No, Ke’Ith heard it as well, and so did Haggar and Zarkon and everybody else still aboard the Eternal Empire. Most of the latter scrambled to survive, to flee, but the former three…

“My Emperor, my son is still down there! Our son!” 

“He is merely your son, not mine, and he chose to die.” 

“I ordered him to!” 

“He could have refused that order! But he still went, and so he dies! Now follow me! We can afford to lose him, but not you!” 

“…”

“Haggar!” 

“Yes, my Emperor…”

Ke’Ith heard the announcement, the warning, the heralding of his more than likely death. He stood outside the locked blast door, cursing himself for having wasted his time earlier with illusions rather than teleportation and such, hearing faint voices inside, almost drowned out by the sentries still sparking around him and the occasional groaning or clanging of metal. From the other side of the door also came another sound. A faint buzzing Ke’Ith soon recognized as the slowly overpowering generator.

But then, an inexplicable rage overcame him. 

He realized something. 

He would not be the only one dying if he found no way to stop Thace. He sensed his mother was leaving the ship-though he’d also felt her immense, but ultimately powerless unwillingness to follow the Emperor…They could all die!

Ke’Ith. 

His mom; Honerva, Haggar, however she may call herself. 

Zarkon; the Emperor, the one holding Ke’Ith’s current home-the Empire-together; the central figurine for almost the entire Galra species. 

The Druids; his new family, cold on the outside, but warm and quirky in their own ways on the inside. 

Captain Verak; though Ke’Ith had only met on one occasion, he could tell Verak was a good guy. He and his men-damn, everyone on this ship- deserved to live. 

And then there were the prisoners as well. So many, most of them unwillingly, would lose their lives because one person judged it was worth it.

Now Ke’Ith’s rage had a goal. 

The rebels. All of them. 

The Coalition. 

The Blade of Marmora. 

Voltron. Yes, even Lance. His heart may have constricted painfully at that and made his breath hitch until Ke’Ith was forced to shakily suck in air as if he’d just run a race, but this...

Ke’Ith could now recognize some of the voices inside the generator room and one of them was definitely Lance. To think the Paladins would endorse this…

Well, Ke’Ith realized another thing. He had not seen blood, or amputations, or anything commonly associated with war before, but now he was sure. The Paladins, maybe the Blade of Marmora too; they sat in an ivory tower, treating and seeing the war as if it were fun and games and not at all the reality in which trillions of lives were on the line every day. 

These people fought to destroy his family, his home, and contrary to the Galra, they had a choice whether to fight or not!

So Ke’Ith channeled all his rage, anger and hate, his sorrow, sadness and despair, as well as all Quintessence he could muster into his fist. 

And then he punched the door.


	50. Vrepit sa!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go! Woooh!

For an emergency this grave, the air oversaturated with uncertainty, the bridge of the Rytam was awfully silent, unnaturally so. Even with the personnel fulfilling their tasks and shuffling about fueled by desperation, even with the consoles and terminals occasionally chiming and beeping, the quiet was choking everyone aboard. 

Except for Zarkon and Haggar. 

The Galran Emperor and his sorceress stood unmoving, eyes fixed on a screen displaying the view of the rear cameras of the Rytam. The screen showed empty space, a vast amount of it, and the Eternal Empire, whose positioning lights flickered and blinked in a maddening pattern everyone present could’ve done without. 

“Admiral?”, Zarkon asked into the tense silence, wanting to know a thing he’d just observed from his subordinate Admiral Yvrok. 

“Yes, my Emperor?”, Yvrok asked back attentively, temporarily shifting his attention fully to the person that’d just spoken to him. 

Zarkon remained calm and quiet for a moment longer as he observed how an officer-Yvrok’s young female half-breed assistant Jara if he was not mistaken-wordlessly took over the Admiral’s work station. Yvrok and his soldiers were fine men and women, Zarkon found. 

Then he answered. 

“Why have we not yet engaged the hyperdrive? And why are we moving at just half the possible speed?” 

Yvrok didn’t show it, but Zarkon could see he had been expecting that question, maybe even at an earlier time. 

“My Emperor,”, Yvrok answered, putting a fist to his chest, “the massive amount of Quintessence radiation from the overloading shield generator interferes with our systems! Until we are out of range, we can’t start up the hyperdrive, and even then, the Solar Barrier’s blast might still damage the fleet!” 

Zarkon narrowed his eyes. “I see. Does that mean there inherently is not enough time to properly or at all evacuate and that we might die because of a construction error?”, he drawled.

“Basically, yes, my Emperor.”, Yvrok concluded. 

Zarkon gave himself time to process that, trying to understand how and why. Then he made a decision. 

“Haggar!”, he called.

“Yes, my Emperor?”, his right hand piped up next to him. 

“Aid Ke’Ith in taking down Thace and aborting the Solar Barrier’s overloading!”, the Galran Emperor ordered. 

“As you wish.”, his High Priestess confirmed, then teleported away, leaving only empty air and the unspoken vow to do everything in her power to stop Thace. 

Mentally, Zarkon smirked. He wouldn’t be killed this easily! The war wouldn’t be lost this easily! 

Vrepit sa!

When Ke’Ith punched the blast door, he didn’t know what to expect. With his Limiter still on and the full extent of his power unknown, anything could’ve happened. And Ke’Ith was ready for anything. 

Anything but this, that is.

Under his Quintessence-infused blow, the door completely gave in, breaking from its frame with a groan, slowly tipping over and crashing to the ground with a loud boom. Ke’Ith lost no time and stormed into the room.

Entering it, he found a startled Thace just whirling around to get battle-ready, the generator behind brightly shining like a second sun, and the massive screens in the room displaying Kolivan and the Paladins.

As he saw Lance and the others, he whined, distraught and enraged at the same. Their presence, even if just through a screen, mocked him, drove him mad. Ke’Ith hated it, hated them, yet seeing the Paladins this early again just reopened his wounds. 

He wanted to go back but also didn’t want to. He wanted to apologize to them but also didn’t want to. He wanted to confess to Lance but also didn’t want to. He wanted Lance but he also didn’t want him. 

Ke’Ith’s whine turned into a growl and he mirrored Thace, himself getting ready to fight. 

Ke’Ith raised his fists, widened his stance and narrowed his eyes, still growling. He steeled himself and infused his limbs with Quintessence once more. Then he charged at Thace, pounced on him; he couldn’t tell, didn’t know, didn’t care; he just wanted to save his family, regardless of whom he went against; and if it was the one he was supposed to crave! 

Vrepit sa!


	51. 20 seconds

Ke’Ith and Thace charged at each other, one with his fists raised, the other with his dagger poised at his opponent.

Just when they were about to have their first repartee, Haggar appeared between them, effectively startling everyone-including the spectators-out of their battle frenzy. 

Silence encompassed the generator room. 

Just briefly, a serene freeze-frame took the place of a soon-to-be all-out duel under the pressure of limited time.

However, that scene was short-lived as Ke’Ith asked “Mom?” into the quiet, prompting Honerva to teleport next to her son, the Paladins and Kolivan to engage in exchanging words of incredulity and Thace to move.

The Blade of Marmora fell back a couple of steps and assumed a new battle stance. Watching him through narrowed eyes, Ke’Ith realized Thace was only playing for time. He wouldn’t let him.

Ke’Ith went to charge once more but was stopped by an announcement that made him freeze.

“Solar Barrier overload imminent. Thirty ticks remaining. Please evacuate immediately.”

Though that made Ke’Ith skid to a halt initially, as soon as it was finished it fueled him, drove him forward. 

It did the same with his mom, it seemed. 

Honerva broke from her rigidness and left Ke’Ith’s side, teleporting to the generator’s console, a hasty “Handle Thace!” leaving her lips.

Ke’Ith growled again. Oh, yes, he’d handle Thace, and if it was the last thing he’d do!

“You will not take my family from me! Nor my home! Never again!”, Ke’Ith cried out, storming forward. Thace charged at him likewise. The battle began.

The two men’s sprints were short ones, too short for Ke’Ith to be fully ready by the time Thace pounced on him, blade raised. 

Just in time, Ke’Ith managed to jump out of the way, briefly staring at the gash carved into the metal floor where he’d just stood. 

This was really a fight for his life, he realized almost belatedly. Almost because he was just barely able to evade Thace’s blow the next time. 

Ke’Ith mentally slapped and willed himself to get a hold already. Inhaling deeply and steeling himself, Ke’Ith resolved not to dodge the next strike. He had just punched through a blast door, damn it!

Thace came at him again, determination burning in his eyes. Ke’Ith raised his fists and infused them with Quintessence.

A split-tick later, Thace’s sprint broke off into several short strides in quick succession, which propelled the Blade into the air, letting him bring down his dagger onto Ke’Ith. 

But Ke’Ith managed to catch Thace’s knife in his hand, making a fist around the bare blade. He tried to wrench it from Thace’s hand, but the man kept it in an iron grip, which looked painful but didn’t keep him from holding on. 

Ke’Ith growled and tugged harsher, but his enemy didn’t budge. He needed a new strategy.

“Solar Barrier overload imminent. Twenty ticks remaining. Please evacuate immediately.” 

Ke’Ith heard that, and it made him bare his teeth and snarl out of pure desperation. “Give in!”, he cried, “You can’t win!” 

“Neither will you!”, Thace countered, taking a swing at Ke’Ith with his free hand. 

At that, Ke’Ith saw the opportunity he needed. He ducked down below his enemy’s blow and headbutted into his chest, Quintessence-infused of course. 

Still, it hurt like hell and Ke’Ith was sure he’d have a gigantic headache later on-if there even was a later-but it fulfilled its purpose. 

The wind got audibly knocked out of Thace and the two men tumbled to the ground in a tangle of limbs Ke’Ith was sure wouldn’t be undone that easily.

Ke’Ith wrestled Thace to the ground, pinning him there and started to choke him. He just hoped Galra didn’t have a higher tolerance for this; he had to get to helping his mom!

Ke’Ith counted the seconds. 

Too many; time was running out. He pressed harder and was rewarded with Thace slowly turning a shade of dark purple, his eyes bloodshot and rolling back into his skull.

Then, the struggling man finally went still.

“Solar Barrier overload imminent. Ten ticks remaining. Please evacuate immediately.”


	52. The blast

As soon as Thace went lax in Ke’Ith’s hands, the Druid jumped up and dashed over to his mother, a desperate “Mom!” leaving his mouth. 

He neither stopped nor cared to celebrate his small victory; in a few ticks, it could either be in vain and everyone and everything Ke’Ith loved would be turned to dust, or they’d stop the overloading and would have eternity and more to reminisce. 

“Nine.”, the computer announced.

Skidding to a halt next to Honerva, Ke’Ith’s thought processes came to an equally sudden stop. His mood took a harsh cliff-dive. 

His mom’s face was scrunched up in confusion, concentration and frustration as she typed away at the terminal, every single character of input making her shut her lips more tightly, narrow her eyes more and deepening the already bottomless creases all over her face. 

“Eight.”

All of Ke’Ith’s unspoken suspicions were confirmed far too soon, as his mom staggered back from the console, wearing her innermost feelings on her face. 

“Seven.”

“Thace did something to the controls I can’t work around! We have to try something else!” 

“Six.”

“What?! How?” 

“Five.”

Dragging Ke’Ith back a few steps, Honerva wordlessly relayed her instructions to Ke’Ith through their mental link. 

“Four.”

Following his mother’s example, Ke’Ith then turned around and raised his arms, channeling Quintessence through his arms and hands, forming a barrier of their own, made of Quintessence. 

“Three.”

Initially, the solid neon yellow barrier was translucent, flickered and wavered, but Ke’Ith fixed that, narrowing his eyes and sending more Quintessence, more determination, more power. 

“Two.”

“One.”

“Zero.”

With a hiss that turned into a desperate scream, Ke’Ith gave all he got, pouring his willpower and directing any and all Quintessence he could somehow muster into the barrier.

Then the light, the sound, the pain encased them. 

Ke’Ith tried to hold out against the onslaught of burning, stinging, immense pressure, pain and agony, but it was too much; he tried to fight it, yet Ke’Ith felt his consciousness waning. 

Belatedly, as the pain creeped into his very being, he realized they’d gravely underestimated the blast. 

And then, without warning or time to process what was happening, everything went dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This'll probably be one of the only times I'll write a note at the end, but I really want and need to know this: Was this chapter (any) good?  
> I'm kinda insecure about this one, feedback would be much appreciated! Thanks in advance!


	53. Where? What? Why?

When Ke’Ith awoke…No, he wasn’t sure whether he awoke at all. It may’ve sounded strange, but Ke’Ith felt more like dreaming than waking.

Opening his eyes and looking around, scanning the vast expanse stretching in all directions, his hunch came true. 

Everywhere he looked, there was only white, clean, spotless, unreflective; Ke’Ith couldn’t tell whether he was lying down or floating in the air.

Getting up, Ke’Ith pondered this new…predicament…he found himself in. Wherever he was, he knew he didn’t belong here.

“Oh, you belong here alright, mortal.”, a voice interrupted him, booming across the white plains and echoing into infinity.

Ke’Ith turned around, and he was sure he’d gotten whiplash from it had it not been for the…strange workings of this place. 

Truth to be told, he didn’t feel the need to breathe, he felt absolutely weightless, lightheaded, and like he was treading on clouds instead of hard ground. 

It may have been a bit naïve and childish to assume this, but was he in heaven?

Searching for the owner of the voice in this place without anything to orient oneself at, Ke’Ith felt a bit dumb for just pivoting on the spot, but he recognized-in frustration at that-there was nothing else to do. 

The voice had come from everywhere, yet nowhere, and it was giving Ke’Ith one hell of a headache-a headache he’d expected way earlier, seeing how he’d headbutted Thace just a few moments ago…

Speaking of which, was there a way to go back?

“There is.”, the voice sounded, “However, we must deem you worthy to return.”

Ke’Ith ground his teeth. Having a disembodied voice read his mind, turning around like a dog chasing its own tail; it was infuriating, not to mention humiliating.

“Show yourself!”, he demanded, readying himself for another battle.

“Ah yes, the mortals and their fixation on the physical appearance of things. Perhaps we shall take on our corporeal forms as well?”, another voice responded and asked ominously.

“It might ease further conversation.”, yet another speaker stated.

And then, in the blink of an eye, they appeared.


	54. Appearance

The first thing Ke’Ith did when they appeared was flinch. 

The seven figures just plopped into existence silently, suddenly standing in front of him in all their glory…

Speaking of which, what were they? 

Ke’Ith tried to take a better look, tried observing and describing, but the second he started, he found that he couldn’t. Not entirely at least. 

He swore they were of different colors, grouped together by hues, accents and undertones, but he wasn’t sure. 

They were…just light. 

Albeit colorful, Ke’Ith saw no extremities, nothing solid, just…light. Or fog, if one demanded another word. 

Again, Ke’Ith wasn’t sure. 

And even though he knew they could read his mind-which filled him with uneasy wariness-he voiced his concerns.

“You know, this isn’t really what I imagined when you said corporeal forms…”

Someone began talking, and somehow Ke’Ith could tell it was one of the figures on the right, clad in white with a diffuse black accentuation. “Is your problem that you know which way to look, but not what to look at exactly, seeing as we have no eyes? Or any kind of discernible body with clear proportions?” 

Ke’Ith narrowed his eyes, this time out of confusion and slight amusement. “That was way to specific, but basically, yes.”, he answered, “But you knew that already, didn’t you?” 

Even though the figures had no heads, Ke’Ith could tell they nodded at that.

The solidly gray one in the middle of the procession then said, “We can indeed read minds, but for us, it is just as important to hear what the ones who come here have to say, as well as do. It provides a healthier base for Judgement, you see.” 

Ke’Ith frowned. “Judgement?”

Instead of answering, the figures first seemed to work on their bodies. It looked a bit like focusing in with a camera, the seven beings before Ke’Ith slowly gaining clarity, more defined edges until they looked perfectly humanoid. 

With the exception of their skin colors, ranging from black to blue and red to white, missing hair, clothes and eyes, the figures were…smooth all around, reminding Ke’Ith of colored, polished marbles, though the fog from earlier still swirled around beneath the surface. 

Ke’Ith wasn’t sure whether that was the right wording, but he thought it described them well enough, though it was still a bit hard to really focus on one of them; it was like a strange power always drew and pushed him back to the entirety of the group. 

Then the gray one spoke.


	55. Questions unanswered

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I'd like to ask: Is there something you think I should improve in this story, be it plot-wise or under the aspect of storytelling?

“Judgement is our sacred duty, mortal. Those who come here are evaluated by us, sorted either into Abyss or Ascension based on how they walked through life and how they perceive themselves. We are the Seven Great Qualifiers, and we will judge you as well.”

Ke’Ith frowned once more as he tried to process and understand what had just been said. But it made no sense. 

The figures’ unspoken yet stubborn refusal to provide him with any context was even more infuriating than talking to them in their incorporeal form. As he tried to find an answer to the statement, silence swept through the white plains like a cold wind. 

Until one of the beings, this time a blood-red one with white accentuations, huffed and crossed its arms.

“Some explaining needs to be done here, don’t you think?”, it asked, and Ke’Ith wasn’t sure whom it had spoken to; him or its…companions.

“I’d like that.”, he said, disregarding his doubts, but a turn of the head and a piercing stare from the figure who’d previously spoken made him trail off towards the end. 

“I did not speak to you, mortal. Know your place.” 

“Now, now,”, the gray one intervened, “let him be. Mortals are simple beings, they dislike being disrespected like that. And that’ll make the lesson we have for him much harder to grasp.” 

“Ha!”, another being, a white one with a red glow barked, “If he is unable to look past a mere rebuke, why are we even sending him back?”

Sending him back? That got Ke’Ith’s attention as he had long since tuned out the conversation, not understanding a word that was said, not humoring the arrogant, insulting tone he was spoken to in. 

Sensing his thoughts, the figures turned to glower at him, but with a jerk of his arm, the gray one silenced them, once again exercising his…questionable…goodwill. 

Coming closer, the being spoke up. “There is indeed explaining to do, some of which might come across as shocking. Ready yourself, mortal.”

Ke’Ith raised an eyebrow but nodded. What could possibly shock him after the events of the past days? After all, he’d left Voltron, left Lan…Not going there!

As his thought processes stumbled over an obstacle that shouldn’t have been one anymore, he shook his head and reorganized himself. 

He’d left Voltron! Found his mother! A new home! A family that took him for who he was, even if they knew each other for just a day and a half! And purpose as well! 

So now that the wounds inflicted upon him by 18 long years of life had finally begun healing, what could possibly shock him?

“You’re dead, mortal.”

This, apparently.

The ice-cold dread settling deep in his stomach felt like a punch to the guts, and Ke’Ith could only freeze in disbelief as all that fact implied and brought with it clicked into place.


	56. A lesson and much more

Silence is a curious thing. 

It comes at the most unexpected of times. 

Like now. 

Ke’Ith realized he should be screaming, crying, he realized he should be angry, sad, anything. Anything but this; he’d gone completely quiet. 

Now that he was listening, even his heart seemed to have stopped beating. 

Did it even do so in the first place, considering where he was?

Where exactly was he, anyways?

Who were the ones he’d been talking to for a few minutes by now?

What was the lesson the gray one had talked about?

And was his mom okay? Emperor Zarkon? Did he save anyone? Did anyone survive?

Had he made any difference? Or would he be lost in the flow of time as just another Druid, ex-  
Paladin, outcast?

Had he mattered? Did he matter? Would he matter?

All these things Ke’Ith didn’t know. And it scared him. Scared him to the point the dread in his guts extended its control to his entire body, shaking him in a grip as hard as metal and as cold as the void of space.

And so Ke’Ith spiraled downwards, losing himself in the maelstrom of his self-decrepitating thoughts.

“…tal.”

“…tal!”

“Ke’Ith!”

Ke’Ith jumped from the sudden shout and looked around frantically, eyes wide. 

What just…happened? 

 

Groaning and shutting his eyes against the sudden assault of bright white, he tried to recollect himself. His headache had come back and his mind felt sluggish, as if it were wading through chest-high mud.

“Ke’Ith.”, someone said once more. 

The addressed reopened his eyes to the Seven Qualifiers standing in front of him, with the gray one having taken a few steps forward, standing directly in front of him. 

Ke’Ith shrinked away.

The gray one towered over him, unmoving. Ke’Ith could feel his gaze on him, cold, judging and heartless. So naturally his next words were surprising.

“Forgive us. We did not think you would react this strongly to something you should have realized by now. However, we find it astonishing to have you think of other’s wellbeing before your own. Not many mortals share that trait with you.” He paused for a moment, letting Ke’Ith process all that, then went on, “Now, let us really explain.”

The gray one gestured to the beings behind him, from the left to the right. 

“As mentioned earlier, we are the Seven Great Qualifiers. Here you see”, he pointed at the group to his left, the one clad in blue, “Reason, Order and Creation. Over there”, he pointed at the other group, the one bearing red hues, “are Madness, Chaos and Destruction. Finally, there is also me, Balance.”

The gray one, Balance, paused for another moment, then raised his arms. 

“This, as you might have guessed, is the gate to the afterlife, the fork in the road between Abyss or Ascension, or Hell and Heaven, in your words. Based on our Judgement, you are assigned to either of those. For all of eternity.”

Another pause. 

“Concerning who we are…We do not know exactly. How or why we came here, who or what put us here and what we are, we do not know. All we are sure of is our duty-the Judgement.”

Yet another pause. 

“However, we have already finished that duty in your case, and we have found a reason to send you back to the mortal realm, the world of the living, so to say.”

“And what would that be?”, Ke’Ith asked, speaking up for the first time during this explanation, trying to fit the sheer amount of information into his aching head.

The Qualifiers looked at him long and hard. 

Ke’Ith began to sweat beneath their gaze, trying his hardest to find out for himself, but he couldn’t, for the life of him, figure out what there was still to do for him. 

He could think of a multitude of things he’d like to do, like spending just one more day with his mom, but nothing struck him as something he had to do.

Then Balance alleviated the increasing tension. “There is somebody waiting for you back in your realm. He doesn’t know it himself yet, would even outright deny it at this point, but the Blue Paladin of Voltron is your soulmate. Your true soulmate. Because no matter what you do or he does or happens in the Universe, he always has a place in the future we foresee for you. A place by your side, that is. Thus, we will resurrect you. Heed our words.”

Now it was Ke’Ith’s turn to look long and hard, all the while trying to handle the onslaught of feelings threatening to overcome him. Pain, happiness, certainty, uncertainty, acceptance, rejection, love, hatred; Ke’Ith just didn’t know. And that scared him all over again.

But then, he made a decision.

“No.”


	57. The end of chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This'll be it for part 1 of what I expect to be 3 for this story! I hope you liked it!
> 
> I belted this chapter out just this evening, I hope it's good! Please tell me if it is and especially if it isn't!
> 
> Also, can I ask the lot of you to write comments and review how you like this fic so far?  
> I'd really, but not exclusively, like the following things to be rated:  
> -The pacing and the flow of the story (Was it good? Too fast? Too slow? Was it fluent?)  
> -The characters and their actions (Understandable? Authentic? Or out of character?)  
> -The events in general (Was it fun to read? Was it exciting where it's supposed to be? Was it angsty where it's supposed to be?)  
> -The wording and grammar (Were there many typos? Grammatical errors? Did I use certain words too often? Was the overall wording too stiff? Too informal?)
> 
> Thanks in advance! This has been an amazing experience I wouldn't be willing to trade for anything so far! Thanks for all the hits, comments and kudos!

The Judges, as Ke’Ith settled on calling them, stared at him with what seemed like genuine surprise. Even though their faces were smooth and eyeless, Ke‘Ith could have sworn to see expressions of confusion on them.

“No what?”, Madness asked, a mockingly suggestive undertone lacing his voice.

Ke’Ith grit his teeth and clenched his fists by his sides.

“No!”, he repeated, “If being resurrected means I’ll have to get together with Lance”, his voice broke and Ke’Ith hated himself for it, “then I’d rather stay dead!” 

Tears started pricking in his eyes. Blinking rapidly, Ke’Ith cursed under his breath. 

Over the years, he’d gotten quite good at predicting and preventing his own crying, but this time he hadn’t seen it coming. His breath hitched and he hiccupped. 

He wouldn’t go back! 

He couldn’t go back!

Balance glared at him through narrowed eyes, the other figures following his example. Although still fuming and tearing up all the same, Ke’Ith quieted down under their piercing gaze.

“You are scared.”, Balance stated factually in the next moment.

“Scared of what?”, Ke’Ith snapped back immediately. Offense was the best defense, he reasoned, though he didn’t even know what he was defending himself from.

The Judges let him stew for a tense second before Balance answered him, laying a hand on his chest where the heart would normally be-if the Judges even had something such as hearts.

“Deep down,”, Balance explained, “you are scared of giving in, becoming vulnerable and loving. You, Ke’Ith,”, Balance pointed at him with his open hand, palm up, “are scared of love and all it brings with it. You are scared of what will happen once you go back to your soulmate, and to circumvent your fears, you build walls. Walls all around you, to keep the love out. To avoid the rejection you are convinced always follows.”

Ke’Ith squirmed where he stood. The Judges may have been capable of reading minds, but to have someone out his darkest, deepest fears and secrets like this…

“Stop.”, he begged, “Please stop. I know all this, okay! But Lance hates me! He really does! I loved-love him,”, the tears finally ran down his face freely, “but he doesn’t love me back! I know that much! I’m not blind, okay! I just-“, Ke’Ith turned around and wiped at his eyes. 

But that just made it worse, and so he sobbed into the back of his hand, the other fisting wrinkles into his robes.

Distantly, Ke’Ith heard the Judges sigh in unison; heavily, defeated, exhausted, resigned. 

Then Balance was suddenly right next to him, laying a cold, hard hand on his shoulder in what was only a mimicry of comfort, a mockery even. 

Ke’Ith flinched away and growled, swatting at the hand. 

Balance kept his grip tight.

“Mortal.”, the gray Judge declared, “I see you are not going to divert from your course of action and thinking. Only time will now be able to help you correct your errors. Thus, let me give you one last advice.”

Balance shifted a bit next to Ke’Ith, his hand uncomfortably kneading his shoulder in the process. Ke’Ith hunched his shoulder and growled again.

“Learn to and let yourself love, Ke’Ith.”, Balance said, “Heed the signs. Return to Voltron.”

At that, Ke’Ith couldn’t take it any longer. 

“NO!”, he screamed, pushing off Balance’s hand and staggering back, turning towards the Judges again. “No! I won’t go back to them! Not after what they did to me! Not after I saw what the Paladins truly are! Not after I saw what Lance truly is!”

“I WAS NOT FINISHED YET!”, Balance boomed, “LISTEN, AND LISTEN WELL, MORTAL!”

At the tone of the voice, Ke’Ith curled in on himself even more than he already had, slowly sinking to the ground and holding his head. 

This was just another example of how it always went. People tried to help him, were genuinely nice, it seemed like they were making progress, but then he always ruined it in the worst possible way. 

It was true; Balance was right. He didn’t know how to love, much less be loved. 

But how was he supposed to know after a lifetime of suffering and rejection?!

He completely and utterly missed Balance’s next words as he zoned out and resumed building his walls.

“If you do not fulfill your destiny, great pain will befall you. Heed our warning.”

And with a snap, Ke’Ith was back.


End file.
